#1
I've got the music written to this song, and this is one of the songs that I'm probably the proudest of that I've written. Not just the lyrics, but the entire song. The lyrics themselves are simple enough to understand and simply written, but like the song says, I've never really and truly written a song from my heart before. I've written songs that have had my influence through them. They were always songs that I could connect to, rather then I was the author. Like stuff someone else would have written. Man, I ****ing love playing the guitar.

I used to think in someway I wrote music to connect to people
I wrote about heartbreak, even though I've never had my heart broken
It made me feel like someone once cared
Even though no one does
Everyone I know is just a passing aquaintance in the hallway
Nobody cares what I'm doing
Tonight

But I love my music
It makes me feel so alive
I love my music
It gives me a reason to wake up
When I fear feeling alone
When I fear being alone

Sometimes it's hard, being away from everyone I love
To sit alone at home, wishing someone cared enough to call on me
Daddy, fly me home
I'm so lonely here

I don't need anyone, but myself.
#2
The biggest complaint about this for me is that nothing rhymes and it feels disjointed (if that's a word). The first verse is good but nothing rhymes. The second and third are okay. Some metaphors and connection between the words, like rhyming, would help. but, the music may be different where you don't need rhyming, but for me, it needs some connection. and on a song about writing a song, it'd be cool with some metaphors. and for some reason, i don't like the line 'but i love music', i think you should make that not as straight foward or something. as of now, it's okay, can be better though. work on it, could be great. crit for crit?
Last edited by Green Clash at Jul 3, 2006,