#1
never would I say
pupil of a sort
but you chose your own name
left your hand raised

I don't believe in easy A's
or answer sheets
so keep studying

hear the bell ring?
how was your break?
the lesson for today:
to learn which mistakes
I meant to make
you'll play connect the dots
including blotches

while I stay intentionally vague
keep your hand raised.

what you would want me to explain
I couldn't say
love dead like a crushed fly

for those of you who said you'd be interested in hearing my lyrics put to music- I started work on recording an album, if you get in touch with me pm or otherwise I'd be more than happy to fill you in
#2
Just another one I've enjoyed from you.

Can't really fault it, it's simplicity leaves it as a great piece, and I really can't think of anything to crit, as I know you can write with more imagery and metaphor, so obviously this was intentionally left out of the piece- I like it. Alot.

Good Job.

If you want, a quick comment on https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=388413 would be much appreciated.

Thought I won't wait, as I haven't exactly given you much to think about. But that should be a compliment
#3
thank a lot mate!

certainly I'll take a look at your piece. but tomorrow, I've been drinking
love dead like a crushed fly

for those of you who said you'd be interested in hearing my lyrics put to music- I started work on recording an album, if you get in touch with me pm or otherwise I'd be more than happy to fill you in
#4
yeah. i'm glad you posted this, because it's not like that **** you posted before. i'm not making much sense tonight but whatever. i like this. i like it because it's simple but it's real. it's not simple in thought, or from where it's coming from. it's just simple in the fact that you've weaved a combination of common phrases into something that is not common at all. this is what people should try for when they write poetry. that is all.

good job.
#5
that is the best reply I've recieved in quite some time. thanks a lot.
love dead like a crushed fly

for those of you who said you'd be interested in hearing my lyrics put to music- I started work on recording an album, if you get in touch with me pm or otherwise I'd be more than happy to fill you in