#1
I've got some new lyrics a friend wrote and I wanna see what you guys think. They are Christian lyrics so if you don't wanna go there then don't bother to say anything.

Im Free
Im sitting here in the rain
In a world full of my own pain
I look up to the sky
And sometimes ask why
When will this pain finally end
And my life will shine bright as a flame

{chorus}
I have finally found my light
In my dark and sinful life
It came to me
And set me free
From all the evil trapped
Trapped deep inside of me

I go now in this lonely walk
Just looking for a sign
And looking at all of the lost people in my life
They are sitting and begging for new life
And I know I can touch them
And give them a touch of him
{chorus}


Thanks guys.
Last edited by LesPaulShuriken at Jul 10, 2006,
#2
Please, close this thread and rename it with only the song title in the thread title.

Thank you;
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#4
I couldn't stand the structure of this piece, it seemed like a flurry of careless words. The concept wasn't bad but the structure was brutal. Try again in my opinion, just rewrite the whole piece. Think of an analogy, use a metaphor something to liven this up.
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#5
I loved this. Okie probably because im a christain and i can relate to what you are saying 100% here, which is cool. I like that in a song. Its always best when you can relate.
I think this would be great to music.
I dont think i ppl can fully appreciate lyrics sometimes until they hear it to music y'know?
But i really like this and congrats for getting some christain stuff up.
Peace out =]

franz xx
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