#1
Okay, i was bored, and kinda depressed, so heres what came out.

Filled with shame wherever i go,
Feel like a lie waiting to be told,
Hiding behind this mask of confusion,
All alone with no one to take me home.

Why has this curse chosen me?
What on Earth can set me free?
Take my hand, lead me away,
To this place never again.

The invisible pereson with something in mind,
The quiet messanger for those who run blind,
in a strange land so far away,
Compare heart to mind with vision so grey.

Why has this curse chosen me?
What on Earth can set me free?
Take my hand, lead me away,
To this place never again.

Thats it, kinda short, but i think i like it a little bit. Tell me what you think.
-Nick
#2
I liked the line, Compare heart to mind with vision so gray. That's a good vivid use of description. I love lyrics like that. Descriptions to emotions. You've got that nailed. I think you've got a great emo/screamo type song there. Keep up the good work 9/10
#5
thanks for the compliments, but is there anything i can work on in terms of my writing?
-Nick
#6
pretty good except the last line of the chorus not so sure bout that i didnt really rhyme very well and didnt fit... "lead me away to this place never again" doesnt make much sense but its good anyways
Member # 5 of Can't we forget about all the subgenres and just ROCK? club