#1
Hey guys,

Sorry to be a pain and do the whole unfinished lyrics thing, but I'm really not sure about these, and wanted feedback as to whether they seemed any good, and whether to carry on.

Anyways, here's the two verses I've written so far:

We pulled six days a week apart, eleven years of Windsor knots,
For them to choose our poster boys, the biggest kids to pick their fights,
The pointless predetermined clash of enemies with secret pacts,
The friendly faces hit the bricks when old traditions click their fingers.

You take your tie, I?ll take my scarf, oh hang the kids that crossed the line,
You pound the drum, I?ll raise the flag, at least we have some common ground,
So hold your breath and cross your fingers, let the rest watch from the windows,
And let the man in black begin the mourning march of marionettes.


Please let me know. Sorry again to be a bother.
#2
I like that man. I really do.
I a good title for it would be just "The Man in Black". Kinda reminds of a book i read....."The Gunslinger" by Stephen King. But thats just my opinion. I like the way it sort of tells a story. Keep on goin with that same theme and you'll get somewhere with it it I can gaurantee you.