#1
I hope you like it and please let me know what you think, crit for crit

God bless<3

A Story From Your Street Lights.

V1:
I?m going heart first over your embankment,
Breaking the silence with this newly loaded statement,
Misused tragedies, and over active lies,
A lover with a temper, and feelings,
Sweetie, don?t look so surprised..

Chorus:
What exactly did you expect?
When the words are crumpled,
And no one will ever know,
Then you?re on your own,
In the dark from these street lights that just fade out.

V2:
When you know how you feel, and just can?t put it on paper
Then, your insecurities are so much safer,
If I wonder why I still
Chase you?
Desire you?
Miss you.
After push comes to accidents
And there?s nothing I can do..

Chorus:
What exactly did you expect?
When the words are crumpled,
And no one will ever know,
Then you?re on your own,
In the dark from these street lights that just fade out.
#2
Love the title, great imaging
Quote by spazzymagee417
i would pay more for a midget corpse than an average size corpse
#5
Yeah, I agree that the title is great. (Why do you think I´m reading it?) Very well written chorus.

I´m a little bit critical to the "chase you, desire you"-thing, it doesn´t seem to fit. But maybe It´ll be good with the music.

The whole thing doesn´t seem to be all finished, maybe you could work on it a little more. It could be a little longer...
Some live, some die. And the rest of us just keep fighting eachother.
#7
Tedrick I tried commenting on yours to crit...and my internet is being weird only on yours though..???