Hye me and my band just wrote a new song and our singer made the lyrics ima skin what u think theyre sorta cheesy and they dont seem to rhyme but they do go with the song in the right beat.. tell me what u think

heres a verse

There she was just sittin there
Long legs, bleach blond hair
So I walked right up to her
and asked her to dance
she stood up and started to smile
o , sir, yes please
I grabbed her by the hand
and lead her to the dancing
She was good quick and elecric
Just like a cat
then we started talking turns out shes with another man
O NO i knew this was gonna happen
Id just been played again
This time by that harlot
Why am i so stupid ..... ths happened again!

I dont even care anymore
ill probly be the same when im 44(or old whichever one)
I just cant seem to move on
I need something to keep me strong

Another verese

Im swimming in a sea of confusion
Why cant i get out of this illusion
IM meseed up clearly and simple
somethin is wrong in my head
But all these peple
Look at me in the wrong way..oooo ya