#1
Leave a link if you please.

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I remember I thoughtfully forgot
When you pretended-but-didn?t-pretend
To insult my mother
(Whom you?ve never met)
With your piercing comments;
And you pointed out my mistakes
To all our listening friends
With your finger of a voice;
And when you forgot to try
To appreciate my birthday.

I hope you can forgive me
For not attending your party.
#2
Excellent. Probably my favourite one of these short and simple pieces you've posted here. I can't find anything wrong with it, it's pretty much perfect. Direct point, good flow, well worded and generally a very excellent piece.

Good Job.
#3
I love it. you manage to use immaturity to your advantage which I've hardly, if ever, see done, and you pulled it off beautifully.

and this line: I remember I thoughtfully forgot
is one of those that I kick myself for not thinking of it first.
#5
its very good, it flows very well, theres not a line that seems out of place to me well done

crit4crit?

links in sig
PSN: Noverion
#6
Very lovely, satirical and black-humoured piece here. Written in a veyr tongue-in-cheek and stylish manner. It is perfect
Quote by Kensai
Maybe you've heard what the ladies say: "Once you go 77mm you don't go back"
#8
Quote by lawloganza
I love it. you manage to use immaturity to your advantage which I've hardly, if ever, see done, and you pulled it off beautifully.

and this line: I remember I thoughtfully forgot
is one of those that I kick myself for not thinking of it first.

My thoughts exactly my man.
At first i didn't like it much but as i read it more i gained a better understanding for it and saw past it's original cover.

Now that i have, i'm glad i did. Well crafted.

Yet another one for you to have a butcher's at if you will in the sig of course.