#1
All crits are appreciated, this is my first posting but definately tear it apart if it sucks.

Thanks.

Anyway... without further adieu...

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The Fire (A Call)

There's a fire in the capitol
It burns all it sees
There's a fire in the MidEast
It burns all the trees

There's something wrong
There's something amiss
Fire crawls towards the rope
That holds us above the abyss

Some care very little
Some quiver in fear
But all just do nothing
As the fire comes near

Is this where it ends
Here in this place?
Will the champions of freedom
Fall flat on their face?

Not through something outside
Will liberty die
But through the apathy
Found in our own eyes

There are few of us left
Who still seem to care
But we'll all stand together
Our shoulders square

Come join us
We can't hold the line for long
Come join us
Stand with my guitar and our song

Come help us
Put this fire under control
Come on, dammit!
The cure is the note
in your soul.

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Its very poemy but... yeah, that's all I got.
Takamine EG531SSC - "Kim"
Fender Mexican Stratocaster - "Jessica"
-Texas Special Pickups
Crate Palomino v16 Class A Tube Amp

Well it's floodin down in Texas
#2
Before the solo, have somone yell, "move it on over, and let Jimi take over."
OBEY THE MIGHTY SHITKICKER
#3
I think its quite good although I dont like this whole 'come let us fight together' stuff. It sound... dunno.. I dont like it.
But you wrote it in a good style sio I think its alright.
Whatkinda music did you think of?
Theres one thing i didnt get. Perhaps Im dumb but I didnt really get the symbolic meaning of the fire... what does it stand for??
#4
Quote by rooster456
Before the solo, have somone yell, "move it on over, and let Jimi take over."


Takamine EG531SSC - "Kim"
Fender Mexican Stratocaster - "Jessica"
-Texas Special Pickups
Crate Palomino v16 Class A Tube Amp

Well it's floodin down in Texas