#1
Hey. This one's pretty obvious, but hopefully pretty interesting too. Leave a link if you please.

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My name is Grant,
And I spend my life
Slowly dying
On the streets of Bristol.

It sure is a big place
Throbbing with familiar chances
And familiar twilight threats.

Us unlucky ones develop a skill;
It lets you find a place to sleep safely
Each night of the dragging year.
One of my personal spots
Is in the shadow of a history museum;
It?s some big, spacious building
With state-of-the-art central heating
And daunting security.

The other cold-morning
I was reading a discarded newspaper
And found an article
About this museum.
It was getting some government grant,
Eighteen million pounds, I think,
For some kind of refurbishment.

Eighteen million pounds!
Give me eighteen grand
And I?ll create enough history
To fill my own museum.

I mean that.
I could make my own history;
But with this type of charity
I won?t even be part of my country?s.
#3
My name is Grant,
And I spend my life
Slowly dying
On the streets of Bristol.
Very nice opening, straight and to the point. I liked it.

It sure is a big place
Throbbing with familiar chances
And familiar twilight threats.
Hmm. I think this should be united with the previous stanza since it's a direct connection and the one that follows is completely seperate. Other than that I liked this bit as well. Well worded.

Us unlucky ones develop a skill;
It lets you find a place to sleep safely
Each night of the dragging year.
One of my personal spots
Is in the shadow of a history museum;
It?s some big, spacious building
With state-of-the-art central heating
And daunting security.
A bit of flow issues in this stanza, the sentences don't seem to connect as well to each other and imo there are some expendable words, for example the first 2 lines could go well without the semicolon and with "that" instead of "it". I found "some big" to be a little awkward as well. All these comments regard the flow, but as for the content, I thought it was very well thought out.

The other cold-morning
I was reading a discarded newspaper
And found an article
About this museum.
It was getting some government grant,
Eighteen million pounds, I think,
For some kind of refurbishment.
The structure here puzzled me, especially lines 3 and 4, but what I found extremely out of place was the casual way you described something that obviously seemed very wrong to the main character (According to the last two stanzas, anyway). But I chose to refer to it as if you were being cynic about it, so I do hope this is what you were going for.

Eighteen million pounds!
Give me eighteen grand
And I?ll create enough history
To fill my own museum.

I mean that.
I could make my own history;
But with this type of charity
I won?t even be part of my country?s.
Again, I thought you could have made these two stanzas stand together. I thought the first stanza was perfectly presented, and the second one wasn't too bad either, only I thought that the last line could have been a little more blunt and outrageous.

Other than the structure, which I thought could be improved, this was a very well written piece with a meaning behind it that you obviously care about, and so I enjoyed reading it very much.

Carmel
This is not a pipe
#5
w00t! Synth's back! Crit my piece

Yeah, CJ, I quite like this. It's well-written - not eloquent, but polished. Gets the message across extremely well. I thoroughly agree with the sentiments, too. I'm sure some of us here know of Dublin's "Spire".
Refreshing to read.
ρ
#6
Us unlucky ones develop a skill;
It lets you find a place to sleep safely
Each night of the dragging year.
One of my personal spots
Is in the shadow of a history museum;
It?s some big, spacious building
With state-of-the-art central heating
And daunting security

I like the way you've introduced mention of expensive facilities as a contradiction to the way in which Grant lives. Perhaps it would benefit from a chorus?

It sure is a big place
Throbbing with familiar chances
And familiar twilight threats.

This is my favourite part, it really gets accross his perception of city life and the empty promises that such an area conveys.

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=407060
#7
Is it a song or a poem?

I don't get a feeling of song from it.
Posers are like punks, except they do it for fashion

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