#1
I've been in a band with a couple of guys for about half a year now. We have had a lot of fun and were very productive. Recently, though, the experience has started to suck. First off, the three of us were hanging out at my place and we decided on practicing both monday and tuesday last week. I walked over to the drummers house on monday, and the bassist wasn't there. We tried calling his cell phone, but he wouldn't pick up. We call his house, and his sister says he's at the movies with his new girlfriend. So, I'm thoroughly pissed right now, but the drummer isn't. The two of them have been best friends since elementary school and are extremely close. For this reason, they won't get or stay mad at one another for any reason. So, I go home and the drummer says he'll call tonight and make sure he's there tomarrow. The next day, I arrive and he's not there. We call his cell, no answer. We call his house, and once again, he is out with his girlfriend, this time at an amusement park. The drummer still isn't mad. He seems like he'd rather blame himself for not making it clear, when I know that we're just getting blown off. I hve hinted at calling another bassist, or just flat out leaving the band. But now, I'm told that next week, we're having practice on tuesday and that the bassist will be there. He wasn't. What should I do? I'm planning on leaving the band for a while if not permanenttly, because I want to play with dedicated and hard-working musicians. I cannot convince the drummer to be mad at the bassist or get an new one, and I can't even get a hold of the bassist. Do you think that the girlfriend thing will blow over soon? Should I leave the band? Or should I just shoot the bassist and his girlfriend, and if there's no shortage of bullets, shoot the drummer too?
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#3
get over it dude...not worth throwing away 6 months of hard work right? either **** it, **** it and get drunk, just talk to them or talk to them and get drunk.
#4
shoot all the mother-****ers!
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#6
Leave the band. If your drummer won't get mad at your bassist for standing you up, he'll never get mad at him. Things will only get worse. The best thing you can do is tell them you need a break, then go looking for musicians that are serious about their music. Everything happens for a reason, and you'll learn from this experience.
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#7
Shoot them all and steal the bassists ho.

The good guy wins AND gets the girl.
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#8
Kick the bassist out. If the drummer won't go for it, then just quit the band. It looks like the bassist will flake out for any girl in the future too.
#9
And if you're worried about a wasting hard work. Keep any music you've written or composed completely. It is yours afterall.
#10
Get his girlfriend pregnant while missing practice. That'll show em.
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#11
give the guy a break. hes got better things to do at the moment. watch, in a week or so, hell be around more often. however, it if continues then get rid of him or leave
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#12
Quote by kev_dunn
give the guy a break. hes got better things to do at the moment. watch, in a week or so, hell be around more often. however, it if continues then get rid of him or leave


That's the worst advice, lol. "He's got more important things to do. So get over it, just wait, maybe he'll start coming."
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#13
yeah, i mean, id rather be with my gf than in band practice. Just give hime another chance, but warn him this time or something.
#14
Stay in the band and find another band to play with too. Then give the band that wants to play priority over the other.
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#15
if youre a really important part in the band, go ahead take a break, talk to the drummer and see if you can have someone sit in for bass while this guys out ****ing his girlfriend. If that bassist is better, and is more deditcated, well then, the drummer should see.
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#16
Instead of talking to the drummer about this, try talking to the bass player and explain how you feel about it. If it doesn't get better, kick him out and do all things to the girl that have surely been mentioned in this thread.
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#17
thats the same crap that happens with me! the 2nd guitarist and the bassist are like best friends so he tolerates him, ive just met the drummer for the 1st time so i dont really know what he thinks but the bassist is terrible...TERRIBLE. He's only been playing for 4 months and he doesnt know wtf hes even doing but if i say something the 2nd guitarist will just say"give him time" and im going ****in nuts cus the bassist doesnt practice and gives no effort really. Its extremely hard to find a drummer willing to practice 3 times a week so i dont wanna leave it, what should I do???
#18
Quote by Pistola
thats the same crap that happens with me! the 2nd guitarist and the bassist are like best friends so he tolerates him, ive just met the drummer for the 1st time so i dont really know what he thinks but the bassist is terrible...TERRIBLE. He's only been playing for 4 months and he doesnt know wtf hes even doing but if i say something the 2nd guitarist will just say"give him time" and im going ****in nuts cus the bassist doesnt practice and gives no effort really. Its extremely hard to find a drummer willing to practice 3 times a week so i dont wanna leave it, what should I do???

Not hijack someone else's thread.

To the original poster, you may have some more issues if you get this pissed off by a few practices, How old is your bassist and such? I can understand being blown off, but if you aren't friends with the guys, it can cause problems like getting really upset. I say talk to the bassist, you said so far you've talked to the drummer but you need to sit down with the bassist and tell him it makes you upset what he's doing. I say you start working on finding some band mates that have your same dedication, and don't shoot anyone, that'll definitely be a turn off when you are audition for other bands. "You SHot a band mate for missing 3 practices?! Yeah I'm sorry you're just not what we're looking for."
I listen to music and I don't need your opinions about what I listen to.
#19
Did none of you people hear of the booty principle!? Its one of the unspoken laws of men along with having to drive your drunk freinds home and never asking who's playing a sport (you can only ask what the score is).
#20
Turn the drummer and bassist against each other. Then we'll see whos mad at who.
#21
yeah, dont get really pissed over two practices. if it stops great, but one more time you need to sit down and talk with him. tell him that you want to keep being productive and work hard with the band, and maybe you guys an work around his girl issues a little (maybe he can only see her monday and tuesday, you could practice wednesday and friday). be flexible and be decent about it, but dont let it slide if it happens again.
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#23
If I was you I would leave....I wouldn't be able to play with musicians who aren't dedicated to what they do. Just leave and wait like a week and see if they're like "noooo man come back we need you we'll change and be more dedicated" and if they don't just join a new band..
#24
Sounds like you want to take this seriously and try to go somewhere and they're just having fun.

It's probably time for a talk about the direction of your band.

Don't quit yet, let's try and be grownups.
#25
I don't understand how it CAN'T be made clear that there is practice with only 3 members. My band had 6 guys in it and if one member missed one practice out of 3 a week, they were flamed. We were very productive in 6 months until we lost our drummer, now I can't even get a hold of some members.

If you have any gigs coming up, then you really need to nail them. Otherwise, if you don't practice the next 2 times, tell them you won't show up unless they organize a practice. If they don't, then leave.
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#27
Wow, I never thought I'd get so many mixed responses...
Call me Steve. All the cool kids are doin it.
Quote by crazynickman

Step One: Wake up in the LATE AFTERNOON
Step Two: Roll around in garbage and lyrical genius
Instant Bob Dylan.
#28
Are the drummer and the bassist really good? If not I would leave and just keep the work as someone said earlier. If they are then they should be willing to work it out.

And r u good friends with either one?
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#30
anyone who's gunna miss a band practice for a girl friend is obviously not dedicated to your band. If this continues , just straight up quit instead of wasteing your time with them.
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#31
Get a serious talk with the bassist. tell him that he has all the time in the world to hang out with his girl, and he only has 2 jams a week with you. so he should respect you and practice as he should.
and if then he still isnt serious, leave them or shoot the girl so the bassist will not have distractions.

but dont leave em without a serious talk 1st
#32
Maybe spending a few afternoons with his girlfriend might be a little more important to him than practicing with a garage band? I dunno man its not that big of a deal imo
#33
If the guy called and said "hey, I can't make it, something came up" then that's one thing... 'cause I can understand getting sidetracked a bit sometimes. But, I mean, if he's not even calling at all, just blowing you off, and then avoiding your calls, too... that's just lame. I know what that's like all too well. I say you really need to talk to the bassist directly, none of that passive agressive bs of starting another band or replacing him behind his back or anything, that's just childish. Talk to the guy yourself, see if he really cares much or not. He may just not be interested in playing anymore, in which case you can replace him with no resistance, or he may just not realize how seriously you're taking it and doesn't know he's pissing you off. But, if he says he's sorry and will show up next time, and then doesn't show up again... then you really need to think about moving on.
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