#1
GODDESS

You are sunrays were night is cast
I wanted you to be the first to know
Of this love, but you had to be the last
Well you may be blind
But I can see great things for us
How do I exist without my lifeblood

Just laying eyes on you makes me blessed
Among mere mortals you are a goddess
Heaven isn't some far-off place
It is the image of your face

You make me so happy
I just have to cry
You make me feel so alive
That I just wanna die
Just trust in me
And don't ask the reasons why

Your body is a temple
Let me in so I could worship it
In the midst of wonder and revel
I live only for an illusion
But I know if you were with me
You could heal my contusions

Just laying eyes on you makes me blessed
Among mere mortals you are a goddess
Heaven isn't some far-off place
It is the image of your face

You make me so happy
I just have to cry
You make me feel so alive
That I just wanna die
Just trust in me
And don't ask the reasons why
Last edited by themarsvolta at Oct 6, 2006,
#2
i thought it was really good minus only a few lines.

i didnt like the "How do I exist without my life's blood" doesnt really fit in the rest of the verse.

i like the chorus, espeically the "you make me feel so alive that i just wanna die"
but try saying "and don't ask the reasons why" using less sylabals (sp?)

good job
When the power of love conquers the love of power, the world will know peice- hendrix
#4
this is good, flo is off once in a while, but the words are amazing, very good man, really liked it, last stanza is really good with the contradictions and the dont ask why. awesome.
i loved it. Making it a song?

(and thanx for crit on mine)
#5
Good. I dont have much to say that hasnt been said already, but its good with a few off lines, but not a big deal. I could definitly see this put to music.