#1
Verse 1
This room's nothing but faded
Faded lives and hopes and dreams
to name a few.
The calender is circa 1980
but I still enjoy the pictures
don't you.

Chorus
I don't know
If I ever made a difference
I don't know
if anyone thought about what I said.
I've had so many toys and games and faces.
I hope Hamlet understands what I meant.

Verse 2
Let's listen to Mr. Bojangles
it doesn't get better than that for me.
Desolation Row was pretty good also
but I never knew what the hell it could mean.

Chorus
I don't know
If I ever made a difference
I don't know
if anyone thought about what I said.
I've had so many toys and games and faces.
I hope Hamlet understands what I meant.

Verse 3
Cover me up and open a window
I like to smell the ocean while I sleep
The closest one is 2000 miles off
but the salt breeze somehow
blows its way to me.

Chorus
I don't know
If I ever made a difference
I don't know
if anyone thought about what I said.
I've had so many toys and games and faces.
I hope Hamlet understands what I meant.
**********

Let me know what you think, leave a link and I'll try to help you out too. Cheers.
- PunkFish
#2
hmmm...its not bad, the flow gets kind of disrupted at parts, but thats just how im reading it maybe...The chorus is good, but i dont understand what hamlet has to do with it. The 3rd verse is very good because i figure there are several ways you can interpret it.

The link for mines in the sig.
thx
#3
This room's nothing but faded
Faded lives and hopes and dreams
to name a few.
The calender is circa 1980
but I still enjoy the pictures
don't you.
nothing wrong here . flows fine

I don't know
If I ever made a difference
I don't know
if anyone thought about what I said.
I've had so many toys and games and faces.
I hope Hamlet understands what I meant
i like it . but i agree with AAA, no idea what hamelt has to do with it

Let's listen to Mr. Bojangles
it doesn't get better than that for me.
Desolation Row was pretty good also
but I never knew what the hell it could mean.
only one thing . id change also to as well . i think it sounds better

Cover me up and open a window
I like to smell the ocean while I sleep
The closest one is 2000 miles off
but the salt breeze somehow
blows its way to me.
nice verse . i like this the best

overall its good . just a few little things . if u could crit my song . This ghost will always be around . thanks bro
#4
Just to clarify... the reference is to the fact that almost all the characters in Hamlet (probably all, you could easily argue) wear masks and faces to hide their true intentions and a big theme of the play is appearance vs. reality.

Anyone else? I'd appreciate it a lot.
#5
I have to say, this is a really good song. It made me feel very calm and peaceful. The language you used was good, and I thought it flowed very well. Verse 3 was beautifully written and I liked the Bob Dylan references in Verse 2. Keep up the good work.

Crit mine please

Happily Ever After