#1
Hiya,

This is a fairly simple, unimaginative fun song that I wrote. I enjoy playing it and it gets a good reception. Read it, let me know what you think needs changing.

Rise To Your Eyes

Now honey, won?t ?cha listen, to what I?m gonna do,
listen to what I?m gonna do when I?m alone with you.

I?m gonna love, love, love you like I know I should,
I?m gonna be bad, bad, bad, until I?m good.
I?m gonna break my back to see you warm,
and I?m gonna rise to your eyes, in the morn.

I?m gonna feel, feel, feel, your long brown hair,
I?m gonna hold, hold, hold you tight, yes, I swear.
I?m gonna kiss, kiss, kiss you ?til my lips go dry,
and if you ever leave me I?m gonna die, die, die.

I?m gonna love, love, love you like I know I should,
I?m gonna be bad, bad, bad, until I?m good.
I?m gonna break my back to see you warm,
and I?m gonna rise to your eyes, in the morn.

I?m gonna feel, feel, feel, your long brown hair,
I?m gonna hold, hold, hold you tight, yes, I swear.
I?m gonna kiss, kiss, kiss you ?til my lips go dry,
and if you ever leave me I?m gonna die, die, die.
#2
ooh, i like this a lot. a good sexual vibe. and seems fun. you have a recorded version?i wana hear it!

crit mine, in the sigg
Last edited by Smoothrider_41 at Aug 12, 2006,
#3
Sounds really zeppeliny. The repetition reminded me of d'yer m'ker (I think thats how you spell it), so, pretty cool song.
#5
haha, i wish this song will be dedictated to me! ahaha, jokin!
anyways, pretty fun thang you wrote, nice.
Feel free to crit ma stuff around, peace
#6
Quote by Sveta
haha, i wish this song will be dedictated to me! ahaha, jokin!
anyways, pretty fun thang you wrote, nice.
Feel free to crit ma stuff around, peace


You've got it!

Dedicated to Sveta!