#1
I saw you just the other night
With the moonlight glistening on your mahogany hair
You showed me the highest tops I could climb
With you, I need nothing else

The day you left, and packed your bags
You packed my heart and soul
I?m never going to forget the days
When I could call you my own

You?re gone now and won?t be back
Until the New Year has come
I just wanted to let you know
I will always be here, for you to hold

You?re the reason I dream at night
And the one I think about all day
If I only had one time to talk to you
?I love you? is all I would have to say

I love you my darling
I love you my babe
I would spend for you all my riches
And your heart, I would save

You?re the sun in my day
And the moon in my night
You light up my soul
And send it into flight

I would glide with you forever
Across the sand and over the seas
You lift me up to a higher place
And I never want to leave

So I give you my heart my darling
And I vow to love you my best
Give you all I can offer
And strive to find you the rest
Its how you look and how you feel
Last edited by Hauf at Aug 13, 2006,
#2
I will always be there, for you to hold (change "there" to "here" for me emotion)
And take out the word Babe (childish, unless that's what you want, idk)

Otherwise it's pretty good, at least as a slow song...good job.
#3
i like it. I can really relate to this and ya. The first verse seems like it doesnt flow very well to me. I think it can be really good tho, just needs a little "touching up". I agree with dyingbreed88 on the part that the word "Babe" seems a little childish. good job tho. keep writing