#1
This is just something else that i have written. please crit it i would apreciate it thanks mate.

Verse 1
I know now, things can only get better,
So goodbye now, goodbye forever,
My brain says yes but not my heart,
it's still holding onto every little part,

Pre chorus
The sound of your voice,
The touch of your hands,
How heavy you were breathing,
During that one last dance,

Chorus
Dreams cross over, Pass us by
We had our chance,
Lets keep alive,
Take a breathe,
Take it slow,
Breathe in deeply,
And let it go,


Verse 2
trouble hearts, its not our fault,
pushed to the end, you know the result ,
nothing more than a start,
we got lost from there, fell apart,

Pre chorus
The sound of your voice,
The touch of your hands,
How heavy you were breathing,
During that one last dance,

Chorus
Dreams cross over, Pass us by
We had our chance,
Lets keep alive,
Take a breathe,
Take it slow,
Breathe in deeply,
And let it go,

Bridge
pushed to the limits, to brave the ice cold,
trapped between,
two sides,
to forever haunt these walls
Dreams cross over, Pass us by
We had our chance,
Lets keep alive,
Take a breathe,
Take it slow,
Breathe in deeply,
And let it go,

Thats about it thanks

later
#2
i love this song jim! it is siruly like my fav thing uv riten!m keep it up
#3
I like it mate. The chorus is really sweet. It's all really good man. I like the first half of the second verse the most. I can only guess who this is about hey jim. The pre-chorus kinda gives it away a little. The "dreams cross over, pass us by" is easily the best line in the songs. It's good as.

Keep up the good work Jim. Read mine.
#5
Wow. This is really, really good. It's really simple but really good. For some funny reason, it's playing along to something from Jack's Mannequin. I can't place the song, but yeah. It's good.
Can't say I was never wrong
But some blame rests on you


Work and play they're never okay
To mix the way we do
#6
Thankyou for the crit everyone. luke, simo, hannah and hideaway sorry don't know ya. Feel free to leave links to your work crit for crit.

Thankyou
later