#1
I can only say I hope he's reading this. If you've ever been betrayed by someone who convinced you that you were friends, as close as brothers even, perhaps you would've felt the same. You may be able to tell, I'm not accustomed to writing metal songs, but I'm discovering my heavier side lately.

Song For Kevin

Blood pours from your eyes like tears,
I?ve killed you now, I?ve killed my fears.
You?re dead now, and that makes me free,
then I wake up, it was just a dream.

Just a dream.

I see you in the street, you hang your head low,
what I would give to see you paralysed and broken though.
And I couldn?t give a damn how you feel about anything,
you used me and treated me like dirt again and again.

And brother, you called me, don?t call me brother,
you?re nothing to me, you?re evil undercover.
Your syndicate of allies act like a witches coven,
I should?ve destroyed you when I could, and lit the oven.

This is all you?re gonna get from me, I?m gonna settle it like this,
because everything you said and did, you were taking the piss.
Now it?s time to get even and time to face the facts,
if I could, I?d choke you to death on your self-made pacts.

Blood pours from your eyes like tears,
I?ve killed you now, I?ve killed my fears.
You?re dead now, and that makes me free,
then I wake up, it was just a dream.

Just a dream.
#2
Dude, been there, don't sing anything you'll regret... my girl friend left me for my best friend... first time I suspected he acted surprised and convinced me it was nothing, a month later he was dating her.
That was nearly two years ago. He's still one of the greatest friends I have.
#3
Erm... Angry :S

You certainly put your feelings across without compromise. I can't relate to this because (I'm lucky enough that) I've never been in such a situation. And from this I can see I'd never want to be.

From a lyrical point of view it flows really well with a nice rhyming scheme. I really like the two "Just a dream" lines. They're stark and, if accompanied by a break in the music, could be *really* powerful in the context of the song.

You've got yourself an evocative set of lyrics here.

If nothing else, I hope writing this acts as some kind of catharsis for you :S Nice work.
#4
Just like to add: it was by playing guitar that I got over it, but the melody, which I still play today when things get rough, came to me naturaly, with no anger, no hate, only the will to move on. I don't know what's happened to you, it may be this guy wasn't really your friend, in that case **** him; other wise give things time.
#5
I am pretty angry with him, and I'm not usually this angry with my lyrics, but the guy is a complete... well, you can tell what I think of him, and I really WON'T regret it. He knows I hate him with a passion now, he won't look me in the eye and he only does look at me when he thinks I can't see him.

Thanks for the suggestions and the crit, anymore out there?
#6
May I ask what happened? You don't need to go in detail, just contextualize.
#7
Skip this bit if you don't wanna hear the bitchy little story, but it was basically that we were going to go into business together. I was arranging a gig for a charity, but he refused to insure it or provide any security. I told him I'd continue doing it, provided he signed the relevant forms, as opposed to me, because I wasn't risking my neck. He went off on one, and that was the beginning of the speedy descent into hatred...

Which is why I've started up my own online music magazine, which will be launched on the 1st September, the link is below if you care. I hope nobody thinks of this as an advert...
#8
He was an immature poisonous vermin who used our disagreement to turn our mutual 'friends' against me. That's pretty much it... I guess.
#9
Money is a bitch...
Dude if you two were close, this will wear off, I didn't want to bellieve it when I was told the same thing, but it's true.
Again if he wasn't it wont matter.

All the best with the magazine.
(it's in my web favorites )
#11
I might be from Lisbon, but you haven't made it in Europe till you play a British summer fest.