#1
This is the first set of lyrics i wrote myself so if you could plz rate

The Other Side of Me
Chorus:
You left with part of me
The other side of me
The side that?s sane
And willing to be

Verse:
You?re the missing piece
That makes me whole again
Its like the other side of me
Was gone until release

I still don?t know
Why you chose to leave
I treated you well
And did what you wanted

Chorus:
But you still left with
The other side of me
The side that?s sane
And willing to be

Verse:
But when you took
Away this side of me
It roused the other half
The fierce side of me

Now I cant stay here
Its to hard to bare
I cant handle life
without the missing pair

Bridge:
The anger inside
Is still alive run
While you can
Or be a man

Stand where you stand

Chorusx2
#2
its pretty cool..i dont know if this is a slow song or fast...so its hard to tell ..but i read this song like medium speed so its pretty good...umm mayb if u added more to the verses..

My songs:
Without
Freedom
#3
You said this was the first set of lyrics you wrote yourself, so Im guessing you know something about writing from writing with other people. Thats pretty much what I would guess here as it seems like you know somewhat what your doing but you dont have a lot of experience. AS far as the writing, its fine; the wording and rhythm dont really have any problems, but it could use some more interesting metaphor or maybe some internal rhyming or alliteration. Its nothing really unique or anything, but that comes with time and exposure, so just keep working on it.
If you could look at my new song and maybe crit it, its in the sig (Untitled). Thanks
#7
I don't think it's bad, but I just couldn't get into it. I have trouble comprehending lyics alot of the time if it doesn't flow, which is truly my problem not yours.

That said, the bridge is very powerful, I like it. Don't change it! Keep at it, and you'll have a diamond song here, just keep working on it 'til it's perfect, but give it time.

If you've got a chance, 'Talkin' Silver Street Blues' is my song on here at the moment, a crit would be most welcome.