#1
Forsaken Purity

All these thoughts coming on too strong
All these thoughts living on too long

Streaks of red flowing straight through my mind
These crimson clouds covering all that?s mine
The chimera of my blade
Setting my eyes to darkened shade

(Chorus)
Deluded by this phantasm
Forever falling in this bottomless chasm
Contemplation of dark temptation
Still in search of inspiration

A fire dwells deep within
A fire released by steel on skin
No more shall I commit this deed
No more shall my heart long to be freed

(Chorus)
Deluded by this phantasm
Forever falling in this bottomless chasm
Contemplation of dark temptation
Still in search of inspiration

With little to hope for I reach this surmise
Belief in the fact that I long for my demise
Shrouded in self-conviction and insecurity
Left without a single trace of purity

I will not fall to false dreams
I will not tear this life at the seams
This blood shall not be forsaken
This life shall never be taken

(Chorus)
Deluded by this phantasm
Forever falling in this bottomless chasm
Contemplation of dark temptation
Still in search of inspiration

The twilight subsides [x5]

Stretch me out before the foreboding menace
Make feeble attempts at upbringing the malice
Again and again, bombard my happiness
But never again, will I return to darkness
#2
good job man. I dont normally like AABB rhyme schemes, but this was really good. Your diction was impecable. I wouldnt have thought to use some of those words in a song. Again, great job.
If to live is to die, then is to die to live? Thats a bunch of S_H_I_T.
#3
Wow, that was really good, dude. The vocabularly was very dark and I liked it. Also, the flow was great as well. My favorite part was definitely the chorus. Very catchy.
Great job.

Crit mine please?

The Seventh Circle