#1
This is the first song i've posted, i hope to get some feedback that will help me.

Fireflies

As I watch the fireflies,
light up the twilight glow,
I think of all the times that past,
the times that moved so slow.

And as i watch the fireflies,
slowly drifting past,
I remember all the moments gone,
When things just weren't so fast.

So I watch these fireflies,
Floating in the breeze,
here I watch these fireflies,
Gliding over trees.
And while I watch these Fireflies,
I think of my past dreams,
As I watch these Fireflies

I Lay and watch the fireflies,
and marvel their allure,
I think "does she remember me?",
Cause I remember her.

So I watch these fireflies,
Floating in the breeze,
here I watch these fireflies,
Gliding over trees.
And while I watch these Fireflies,
I think of those past days,
As I watch the,
As I watch the,
As I watch the fireflies

So I watch these fireflies,
Floating in the breeze,
here I watch these fireflies,
Gliding over trees.
And while I watch these Fireflies,
I think of those past days,
As I watch the,
As I watch the,
As I watch the fireflies
#3
I think you use the "i watch these fireflies" lines too much. You hint at the girl once in the song but you don't really elaborate becuase you're describing the fireflies more. Try to add a little more about the girl but still keep it secretive. I hope you don't take this the wrong way because I mean all the best and want you to better your song. Looking pretty good so far, keep it up man.