#1
Look at the world around us,
God I wish they hadn't found us here.
Otherwise I'd still be waiting,
for the world to start fading out.

But do you know what's truly stunning?
They found me while I was running away
From what I did not know,
At least that's what my magazines say so.

Look at the one's we know.
First they come, and then they go away.
They're the one's with hope we share
That someday, we'll make it somewhere big.

Come here, Let's watch the world go by.
Come here, We'll have fun, and we'll get high on life.

Over here is where they say,
Over there is the place to be.
But over there they also know
That over here is where the grass grows green.

But why so much greed and hate?
Let's make a stand, before it gets too late.
All's fair in love and war
But I see nothing that's worth killing for.

Come here, Let's watch the world go by.
Come here, We'll have fun, and we'll get high on life.
My stuff
Fender Telecaster Aerodyne Series
Gibson 1980 Les Paul Standard
Fender Standard Strat
Taylor 414-ce
Takamine Acoustic
1938 Gibson Lap Steel (priceless)
Fender Blues Junior
USA Big Muff Pi
Danelectro Fab Overdrive

My band
#2
sweet stuff. This is original, and it had my attention pretty well, unlike a few other songs i have reviewed. the flow was good, good choice of language, but, this needs slight tweaking, especially the chorus line...i found it as the only thing a bit cliche...the 'let's watch the world go by', i mean, it's a good line, but...you wanna make the reader go 'WOW, right, now that WAS a COOL line, and i haven't seen it before....i didnt see that coming! heh!''...you know...and there's a few bad rhymes...make them more interesting mate, and you'll get this somewhere.

if u don't mind, can you plz review mine? the link is in the sig. 'pale barf'.
#3
Yeah, the rhyming, when i sing the song it sounds a lot better because the structure is a little different than most songs.
My stuff
Fender Telecaster Aerodyne Series
Gibson 1980 Les Paul Standard
Fender Standard Strat
Taylor 414-ce
Takamine Acoustic
1938 Gibson Lap Steel (priceless)
Fender Blues Junior
USA Big Muff Pi
Danelectro Fab Overdrive

My band