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#1
Basically post anything you find hilarious that someone from a reputable metal band has said:

"Ha! We [Metallica] will never make a video for MTV. We play for our fans." - Lars Ulrich, 1986

?I like jazz, but I could never play it. You just sit there with a guitar the size of a Chevy on your chest, wearing a stupid hat, playing the same solo for an hour.? - Dave Mustaine.


"If you guys are going to be throwing beer bottles at us, at least make sure they're full." - Dave Mustaine
As a result of listing <><'s reports I was banned.

Quote by God Book
#2. Banned by theguitarist (11/03/2006) - X D

Promise to shorten your sig and you'll be unbanned. This is what you get, lol.


HA!
#4
"who is saying that...? F*CK THEM!!!" - Blasphemer
Quote by ToolBass_dude
Look on youtube.com- search "rediculously hard classical **** that no one in their right mind would try" and you'll find some 5 year old asian kids playing it
#5
Quote by grungerag13
are the dave mustaine quotes supposed to be ironic like lars?

Uhhh the Lars quote is ironic, the others arn't... Dave says alot of funny/stupid ****.

I got another one, the Trivium myspace:

"Genre: Trash / Metal / Thrash"
As a result of listing <><'s reports I was banned.

Quote by God Book
#2. Banned by theguitarist (11/03/2006) - X D

Promise to shorten your sig and you'll be unbanned. This is what you get, lol.


HA!
#8
Quote by glm
You beat me to it.

That ****'s really not that great.
As a result of listing <><'s reports I was banned.

Quote by God Book
#2. Banned by theguitarist (11/03/2006) - X D

Promise to shorten your sig and you'll be unbanned. This is what you get, lol.


HA!
#11
dave mustaine ftw


At Ozzfest '98 in West Palm, FL, some chick was screaming ?**** me Dave, **** me!?, and he goes ?**** you? Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror you fat tub of guts?"


(On the remastering and remixing of Rust In Peace)

"I reached the point in the end where I didn't want to see another fader, and the only knob I wanted to play with was my own."


Even though I've found God, I still love blow jobs, and I still say ****."

(From the 'Terrorizer' magazine about Black Metal bands)

?There are a lot of good guys out there. I listen to some of these bands and I?m thinkin?, 'If the singer didn?t sing like that?' There?s a great groundswell of talent in Norway and Sweden. I heard this one band and the guitar player was just ripping and then I looked on the internet and the guy?s got hair down to his waist, he?s covered in tattoos and piercing and his face is painted black and white ? **** that! Walking around with an Oreo cookie for a head. An Oreo is two black cookies with a white cream filling. If I picked a guitar player and he showed up looking like that, I wouldn?t answer the door! You?d see my redheaded ass goin? over the back fence!?

On the recording of Youthanasia)

"Our last album [Countdown to Extinction] was just about as perfect as it could get, but when I noticed that I was washing the hairs on my balls one at a time, I realized that maybe I was being a touch too anal."


Youtube covers

[url="http://www.youtube.com/user/MrJumboHumbo[/URL"]
Last edited by Night_Lights at Sep 10, 2006,
#12
Quote by SGRocker0791


Quote by HuckIt
My weirdest dream would have to be when I dreamed that I met this chick I really liked and wanted to practice sex, so I practiced on some guy I met at a gas station...that was pretty screwed up.
#13
Quote by Night_Lights
dave mustaine ftw


At Ozzfest '98 in West Palm, FL, some chick was screaming ?**** me Dave, **** me!?, and he goes ?**** you? Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror you fat tub of guts?"


(On the remastering and remixing of Rust In Peace)

"I reached the point in the end where I didn't want to see another fader, and the only knob I wanted to play with was my own."


Even though I've found God, I still love blow jobs, and I still say ****."

(From the 'Terrorizer' magazine about Black Metal bands)

?There are a lot of good guys out there. I listen to some of these bands and I?m thinkin?, 'If the singer didn?t sing like that?' There?s a great groundswell of talent in Norway and Sweden. I heard this one band and the guitar player was just ripping and then I looked on the internet and the guy?s got hair down to his waist, he?s covered in tattoos and piercing and his face is painted black and white ? **** that! Walking around with an Oreo cookie for a head. An Oreo is two black cookies with a white cream filling. If I picked a guitar player and he showed up looking like that, I wouldn?t answer the door! You?d see my redheaded ass goin? over the back fence!?

On the recording of Youthanasia)

"Our last album [Countdown to Extinction] was just about as perfect as it could get, but when I noticed that I was washing the hairs on my balls one at a time, I realized that maybe I was being a touch too anal."




Wow Mustaine ****ing owns.
#15
Dave Mustaine:
"If I'm gonna commit suicide, I'll go out eatin' pussy to death."

Cliff Burton:
"We do what we want...... We don't care what anyone else thinks" -- from Cliff 'em All

Too bad he died.
#16
Quote by Night_Lights
dave mustaine ftw


At Ozzfest '98 in West Palm, FL, some chick was screaming ?**** me Dave, **** me!?, and he goes ?**** you? Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror you fat tub of guts?"


(On the remastering and remixing of Rust In Peace)

"I reached the point in the end where I didn't want to see another fader, and the only knob I wanted to play with was my own."


Even though I've found God, I still love blow jobs, and I still say ****."

(From the 'Terrorizer' magazine about Black Metal bands)

?There are a lot of good guys out there. I listen to some of these bands and I?m thinkin?, 'If the singer didn?t sing like that?' There?s a great groundswell of talent in Norway and Sweden. I heard this one band and the guitar player was just ripping and then I looked on the internet and the guy?s got hair down to his waist, he?s covered in tattoos and piercing and his face is painted black and white ? **** that! Walking around with an Oreo cookie for a head. An Oreo is two black cookies with a white cream filling. If I picked a guitar player and he showed up looking like that, I wouldn?t answer the door! You?d see my redheaded ass goin? over the back fence!?

On the recording of Youthanasia)

"Our last album [Countdown to Extinction] was just about as perfect as it could get, but when I noticed that I was washing the hairs on my balls one at a time, I realized that maybe I was being a touch too anal."




Ha... indeed.
If you are reading this, you fail at life. Go cut yourself and save yourself more misery.

Quote by Antartica.
What do you think about Opeths soft singer, do you think they need that vocalist or is that wut makes them Opeth?
#18
?That was a great time, the summer of '71 - I can't remember it, but I'll never forget it.?- Lemmy Kilmister
#19
"We are evil but we like to feel the
brown ooze cling to us as we perform."-Impurath of Black Witchery.

I win.
#20
"Gene simmons would say that he invented the devilhorns, Gene simmons would also say he invented pants."


DIO ftw


"Ihsahn: It has been said that we are the best black metal band.

Samoth: no they did not

Ihsahn with a very soft voice: i believed they did....."


I am sorry if did not got it right, its from a old norwegien docu about black metal.
Last edited by Davidian at Sep 10, 2006,
#21
"Do you remember the rumour of Keith Richards getting his blood changed? I thought it'd be a good idea because speed is habit-forming and I'd been doing it and drinking for over twenty years. If you have your I'd suppose that there's nothing in it and that it's clean - maybe like when I was a kid. Once the doctor saw what I'd done and the hours I keep he told me to forget it, "Pure blood will probably kill ya!!" - Lemmy

lol

don't remember it correctly, but more Lemmy:

Lemmy's response to the advice of his doctor to eat more vegetables: "Well I eat potato chips, that's vegetables too!"

Lol Lemmy is the MAN.
Die Sonne graut dem Morgen
Morsch sind Baum und Pfad
Die Sonne graut dem Morgen
mir ist kalt...
#22
i think in the documentary "Metal A Headbangers journey"
a very drunk Maniac keeps telling people to "Fuck off"
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his
#24
Mikeal Akerfeldt: How many of you bought our new album?
Crowd: *Cheers*
Mikeal Akerfeldt: How many of you downloaded it for free off the internet?
Crowd: *Cheers louder*
Mikeal Akerfeldt: That's Fucking brilliant

Member #10 Of The Black Tooth Grin: Dimebag Memorial Club. PM Narmi To Join
#25
There's a vid somewhere in the video thread, but I like the one where Akerfeldt teaches the crowd to growl, and he spends like 5 minutes doing it, then he's like "Okay...this next song we're gonna play...well, it doesn't really have any growling...so I guess that was kinda pointless...but here it is."
Dead soldier! Go now to Valhalla!
#26
Quote by SGRocker0791


DUDE!! That was the same guy that did the John Petrucci vids!! IT has to be. It's the same voice!


Watch the one that shows the whole interview, this guy HAS to be the poster child for anti-semitism. He's so awesome, but it's not for the light hearted.


I've always liked:

This- Best quotes EVER!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKFBn-97_9k

"I know everyting about metal."

"That's right, that was Smoke on the Water, by Black Sabbath."

Voted 3rd Friendliest User of UG 2010

BUILD A TIME MACHINE, AND JERK OFF IN IT, AND SEND IT TO HITLER!


Saxo-Walrus

Steam & PSN ID: Panopticon20
#30
Quote by DeathLegionaire
It was in the Opeth: Guess the riff video.



LOL "I wrote that riff back in 1984."
#31
"Soon, i shall be dictator of all Scandinavia" - Vargina

"Some people said the record was fucking cold, other people said it was fucking cold, and the critics said that it was fucking cold" - Fenriz

"Some people said the record was minimal, other people said it was minimal, and the critics said that it was minimalistic" - Fenriz

"Germany SUCKS!! *notices that he is in the middle of the Wacken Festival*... for us...." - Necrobutcher

"The power of the dragonflame will burn brighter than ever before!" - Luca Turulli (sp?)

"Duuude! Heavy metal ruuuules dude! All this fuckin punk stuff sucks maaan! Its not from this world maaan, its from, like, another planet or something! Its from like, maaaaaars or something duuuude!" - Some drunken moron from a video clip i've seen on 1 or 2 metal documentaries.
I was bad with usernames at age 12. Ah woe.
Last edited by IgnoreThis at Sep 10, 2006,
#32
That drunken moron is from Heavy Metal Parking Lot, a supposedly legendary documentary on metal, filmed in the setting of an arena parking lot before Judas Priest.
#33
Quote by Rakoro
That drunken moron is from Heavy Metal Parking Lot, a supposedly legendary documentary on metal, filmed in the setting of an arena parking lot before Judas Priest.


Decline of the Western Civilization II: The Metal Years, or something I think.
#34
^I saw it on a youtube video and on the Vh1 metal documentary, is Heavy Metal Parking Lot any good? Terrible name though, haha

Edit - Or Decline of the Western Civilization II: The Metal Years then
I was bad with usernames at age 12. Ah woe.
#35
"We make bread and other people can make cake, but you grow tired of cake too. So we just make ordinary bread" - Fenriz
#36
soft, ominous voice

"my name is ihsahn...and i believe in power and wisdom...."
Youtube covers

[url="http://www.youtube.com/user/MrJumboHumbo[/URL"]
#37
Quote by IgnoreThis
^I saw it on a youtube video and on the Vh1 metal documentary, is Heavy Metal Parking Lot any good? Terrible name though, haha

Edit - Or Decline of the Western Civilization II: The Metal Years then


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhRCVm-1r2k

Decide for yourself there.

Just clips.
#39
Yeah it's nice to know that metalheads are much more refined in intelligence now a days.
#40
Quote by IgnoreThis

"Some people said the record was fucking cold, other people said it was fucking cold, and the critics said that it was fucking cold" - Fenriz

"Some people said the record was minimal, other people said it was minimal, and the critics said that it was minimalistic" - Fenriz


*picks up cigarette*
*picks up beer*
*puts beer to mouth, doesn't take a sip, then puts it down*
*does nothing with cig*

That video is ****ing hilarious.
Quote by HuckIt
My weirdest dream would have to be when I dreamed that I met this chick I really liked and wanted to practice sex, so I practiced on some guy I met at a gas station...that was pretty screwed up.
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