#2
Its not bad, seems kind of plain though. i can see where you are trying to have it go but i dont think you reach your goal well enough. the transitions between both emotions should be sudden and catch the listener off guard. your transitions are just like rises and falls in normal compositions. it still sounds good but i dont feel that it meets the 2 emotions at once thing.


feel free to check out mine:
http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=432366
Quote by happytimeharry
ig·no·rant

1. Lacking education or knowledge.
2. Showing or arising from a lack of education or knowledge: an ignorant mistake.
3. Unaware or uninformed.

also see: elitist asshat
#3
I can see what you mean about the gentle eb-and-flow, and The way I naturally segue riffs kind of begat that..... I was kind of manically depressed, angry, and with far too much nervous energy the whole time I was writing and recording, so that's where the emotions came from, the depression and anger kind of tied together, which just left the nervous energy to make the accenting on the quick angrier descending line, which I guess didnt work as well as i initially thought..... Looks like I'll be re-recording this!
#4
Yeah, I don't really think of schizophrenia when I hear this song. It was much more soothing to me than that. It was still highly enjoyable, but I do believe you missed the mark there. I really like the end half the best. It's a nice piece, just not really like you'd intended.

If you don't mind: TrapBox