#1
this is a song i just got done writing....i hope you ppl who see it like it.

Come back to me (thats the name of it)

1st verse
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When you walked away
on the cold decemeber day
you left me all alone
I didnt know what to say
you walked into the falling snow
as I watched as the cold wind blew
there was nothing i could do
to make you stay with me

Pre-Chorus
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
but now I see clearly
there were a lot of things
I could have said that day
so maybe you might have stayed

Chorus
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Come back to me
Come back to me, baby
we can make it through
if we try some way
Come back to me
Come back to me, baby
we will make it through
so maybe you might stay

2nd verse
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It's been awhile since you've been away
since you left me on that cold december day
so now i stand here in the falling snow
as i think back to that day
people tell me you've found someone new
and I think what did I do
to make you replace me so fast
maybe..it was because I thought it would last

Chorus-
Interlude-
chorus and fade-
"As long as I'm satisfied with my work, I'm not too concerned with what any critics think, but when I can stand on a stage and see a lot of smiling faces in the crowd, it makes it all worthwhile." ? Randy Rhodes
#2
I had some trouble finding the flow, but that just may be me not liking the rhyme scheme....not a lot of imagery, but that's ok sometimes, and I think this is one of them. Doesn't try to load itself up with pointless metaphors like some do. Not bad 'tall.
<Han> I love Hitler
#3
I really enjoyed reading this piece. For when it was easy to understand and I didn't have to guess what a million different metaphors mean. I thought it flowed well and the wording you used was simple yet beautiful. Nice job and keep up the good work.

Crit mine please?

Azrael