#1
What you feel, is an afterthought.
What you eat, ain't what you brought.

What you ask, from the gods above.
Send you love, give some satisfaction.

Chorus: All that you mean to be,
is denying what you can see.
Everybody knows, honestly.
You don't fool me. 3x's

Nightmare on the movie screen,
while the magic blurs in your limosine.

Fabrication, is your motivation.
Send it away, deliver an opposite reaction.

Chorus again, then

Youuuuu, be my love, cursed love, cursed love


This is done mostly with drums and a bass guitar.

Crit for crit
#3
decent . just go back and fix some little stuff like flow and all that . 7/ not bad . if u could crit mine "climb the stairs and then watch yourself fall" thanks bro
#4
This is pretty cool, I would only alter a few lines in terms of flow and such.

Fabrication, is your motivation.
Send it away, deliver an opposite reaction.

That last line seems a little long, though I guess you could stretch the melody to suit, which would make for a cool sound.

The chorus seems to be the only part I couldn't really get into, the rest of the song is quite good. I'd try and make the rhymes in the chorus a little less common, but that could be what you're going for, a simple yet catchy chorus, it's up to what you want in the song.

Nightmare on the movie screen,
while the magic blurs in your limosine.

That's cool .
#5
9/10! I'd say it's pretty good. You should add more content, give the song a little more volume. I say that, of course, because I think it's good. The metaphorical language is genius and the variety of language keeps it interesting.

If you feel like it, please crit mine, it's called Masquerade. Thanks!
Cause I love feelin' dirty
And I love feelin' cheap
And I love it when you hurt me
So drive those staples deep