#1
This is a song I've rewritten that I wrote awhile back so give me some crits, thanks

Verse:
Why didn't I lock my bedroom door
To block out all the screaming and to ignore
The violence it makes me wanna go insane
You've tortured me for way too long
I'll never be the same

Chorus:
And today I'll make it on my own
(I don't need you no more)
And today I'll never be the same
(Cuz you took it all away)

Verse:
Screaming your always screaming
This pain is too hard to bare
And just one year ago
You could still call this ****ed up place a home
And just one year ago everything was alright

Chorus

guitar solo

Chorus end

Crit4Crit and don't say it's emo cuz it's not
With an irresistible blend of reggae induced hip-hop and catchy pop-punk hooks, Half Chance Heroes captivates audiences with their unique sound and energetic stage show. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8bSU0u8uvM
#2
Wow.... I love it. The whole thing is absolutely amazing. Don't change a thing, it's perfect. My favorite part is the chorus and " the violence it makes me want to go insane" phrase. I would really wanna hear this as a song, it'd be awesome. You're a genius, my friend, a genius.

Hey, if you feel like it, please review mine. It's called Masquerade, thanks!
Cause I love feelin' dirty
And I love feelin' cheap
And I love it when you hurt me
So drive those staples deep
#3
hey that's pretty good!! i'd like to hear it with some music. 9/10

everyone, please crit mine, it's called "a hundred cigarettes"
...."this is what's best for me, for you, for us, or maybe just for me", i thought...
#5
I find it sort of interesting to notice that you're a Blink-182 fan, and then read the piece...

Anyway, I thought it was quite good for a piece of its simplicity. It came across as cliche in some lines and the whole piece seemed like it had already been done, but like I said, you did a good job on a simple piece.

Do you mind giving one of mine a review? Take your pick from my sig.
#8
I like it, it comes off a bit childish but that could be easily fixed by correcting the mispelled words - Cuz > Cause, Bare > bear...and I would change "no more" to "any more" besides that, good sh*t.