#1
I re-wrote and re- titled this.

Its now called "politicians and antonyms"

Politicians and antonyms


Up is down,
Comfort is fright
A smile is a frown,
Wrong is now right

Ugly is beautiful
Peace is a war
Greed is charity
The rich are poor

Treat me like a dog,
I?ll love every minute
Throw me a bone,
And I?m forever yours
Show me all the bodies
I promise not to tell
What?s a few million dead,
Between good old pals

Black is white
Sweet is sour
Hate is now love
A minute is an hour

A is now Z
Opposites repel,
Dark becomes light
A secret is to tell

Treat me like a dog,
I?ll love every minute
Throw me a bone,
And I?m forever yours
Show me all the bodies
I promise not to tell
What?s a few million dead,
Between good old pals

North is now south
Anger is understanding
Order is anarchy
A departure is a landing

Treat me like a dog,
I?ll love every minute
Throw me a bone,
And I?m forever yours
Last edited by Heascase at Sep 30, 2006,
#2
cool. the whole opposite thing (sorry I'm not sure how to word that) is interesting and makes the piece more enjoyable. the lines "North is now south, Anger is understanding, Order is anarchy, A departure is a landing" really stand out to me for some reason. I feel this piece is very well written. none of the lines seem out of place here. excellent job, a 9/10. if you want to crit my piece "Shattered and Confused" it's in my sig.
B.C. RICH
#3
...Ya man I thought this was pretty good,usually this type of thing... short lines and quick rhymes...."hey that sounds pretty good" anyway....dont keep my interest but this was the exception,wish I could tell you why but I dont really know myself...great piece though....
#4
Feck, I wish I had written this. SO much killer rhyme and the opposites are great!
#5
The opposite thing has been done many times but there were a few good ones.

"Anger is understanding" i thought was good.
Im working on Budding flower right now.