Let me know what you guys think. I stopped here cuz I wanted to know if i was going in the right direction with this song. SO tell me what you think and please rate it and critisize it cuz i want it to be really good. Thanks

Its Homecoming Day
She wakes up and says its gonna be ok
she gets ready for the day ahead
a limo a dinner and a dance with a friend
Does she relize I wont be there
Or does she not care
Am I gonna be Replaceable
Or is she never gonna be full-
ly statisfied with the dance
is that my only chance
Baby are you missing me now
or Baby will you not miss me at all

Before Homcoming dinner
Did u miss me in the picture
And when it got colder
Did you miss my arm over your shoulder
Or where you fine without me tonight
when it came time to slowdance
where you fine to hold hands
with another guy
or where u not fine
and all you wanted to do was hold me tight
its not too bad , has a very EMO feel to it though, almost like a personal experiecnce you had perhaps,if so, its up to you to make me feel like its happened to me.It seems to be missing emotion,your telling us a story but not the feelings behind it, thats about the best I can explaine it. keep at it and Ill crit again in a couple days....My latest is "FLY HIGH" your crit will also be appreciated.