#1
This one is called Self Destruction. it may be a little long, any suggestions as to shortening it?

it's out for you. its coming will be of no surprise, even though fear of it is greater
than your shallow knoweldge to the truth. its been on the edge of your mind, and it secretly wants to jump off, but it cant. you wont let it. you are completely aware of the destruction you are causing, and you dont care. some would call you selfish, but you wouldnt. the damage you're causing is solely to yourself.

you hear it. you know its coming closer. you cant resist the temptation. you have to call it closer. with every beat of your cold heart, everytime you flick that lighter, with every cap you pop, it draws closer. its smokey complextion and drunken movents are what set it apart from all the other terror you've conceived. worst yet, you know whats brought it to you the most. your multiple faces, the hypocriticy of your constant backstabbing you do. you're destroying another heart, and then it comes. within seconds, you break down. the smoke you've taken in is released, you heart hardens to becoming a rock, your liver vanishes before you're eyes. it has found you. self destruction.
"it is better to be a part of beauty
for one instant and then to cease
to exist than to exist forever
and never be part of beauty"
-Don Marquis

Quote by nebraskan
People who are racist are probably the most ignorant alive.

A serious sig? WHATTT?
#2
it's out for you.
its coming will be of no surprise,
even though fear of it is greater
than your shallow knoweldge of the truth.
its been on the edge of your mind,
and it secretly wants to jump off,
but it cant, cause you wont let it.
you are completely aware of the destruction you are causing,
and you dont care.
some would call you selfish,
but you wouldnt care,
the damage you're causing is solely to yourself.

you hear it.
you know its coming closer.
you cant resist the temptation.
you have to call it closer.
with every beat of your cold heart,
everytime you flick that lighter,
with every cap you pop,
it draws closer.
its smokey complextion and drunken movents are what set it apart from all the other terror you've conceived.
worst yet, you know whats brought it to you the most.
your multiple faces,
the hypocriticy of your constant backstabbing you do.
you're destroying another heart,
and then it comes. within seconds,
you break down.
the smoke you've taken in is released,
you heart hardens to becoming a rock,
your liver vanishes before you're eyes.
it has found you. self destruction.

well thats what i do to make things easier to read...so yeah...dont have to coment on it, but altogether i can say it needs a bit of work