Hey, i'm new here and just wanted to see what you thought of these. They're not really coherent, but I just want to know how good (or not) I am at this .

This would be a verse, most probably the first in the song. Mid tempo or fast.

You're falling from grace
The look on your face
Was priceless and ideal

You've lost the race
No need to chase
Me down because i'm gone

This is just the beginning of a song I wanted to write about fake, shallow bitchy people. I'm not too sure what I think of it tbh, I look at it and think it's good sometimes and bollocks others lol. And yeah, I know the last line of the verse is crap, but it's the best I could do

You bitch
You lie
You're poison in disguise
You're so obsessed with populartity

That you don't seem
To realise
That noone really cares.

They don't know
What you say
You put on a show
And fake your way
Through all the groups
But yet all day
You tell the rest
How you hate them all
And you're the best

They're pretty simple, my first kinda step into songwriting. They'd be used in punk style songs.
Last edited by Gonk at Jan 14, 2007,