#1
This is one of my new songs

"My Little Tragedy"

White Lies
Cloudy Dreams
Can Reality,
Tear at the Seams?

We Fail,
To see our flaws,
Until we can,
Surpass the laws,

Of Reality.

Or so we think.

[:Chorus:]
My little tragedy,
Help me to keep insane,
Remove my thoughts,
From this world of pain.
Tell me you love me,
Show me you hate me,
Let me know,
You're not just a Dream.

Illusions,
Seem to fool,
But what if,
during the illusion,
you're the tool?

[:Chorus:]
My little tragedy,
Help me to keep insane,
Remove my thoughts,
From this world of pain.
Tell me you love me,
Show me you hate me,
Save Me From You,
Let me know,
You're not just a Dream.

Are you Real?

Tell me you love me,
Show me you hate me,

Am I Fake?

Tell me you love me,
Show me you hate me,

Tell me,
Is anyone awake?
#3
sounds like you had no vocal point for all of this emotion. kind of just trying to say a bunch of "good lines" that never tied together. a bunch of images, but none working towards the same picture. maybe try picking one of the lines and extending with that sole idea a bit more instead of pulling in a new idea for each line.

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=506101 - my latest, whenever you get the chance