#1
I've seen a lot of stories on this site recently about how some crap guitarist at school tried to tell you that they could play, and then they played a green day song badly, and then you blasted out some solos by mastadon on your Ibanez, and then that kid cried cos he got owned.

Utter bollocks right? Well so I thought too, but tonight I was sitting around with the guys jamming on the back veranda when this 7 year old kid, James, who we were sort of babysitting, picks up a guitar.

So James said he was going to play something, but he just bashed the strings without even fretting them, and to no particular rhythm, and made up a stupid song that made no sense and didn't even rhyme. Man did that kid suck.

So I took the guitar off him and played some Eric Clapton, and then I played this other Flamenco pattern I wrote the other night while my brother soloed over the top a la Santana, and everyone was like "hey that sounds cool".

I totally owned that kid, because I'm 24 and I've been playing for 10 years, and he's 7, can't play the guitar and has ADD. He was so crap, he didn't even realise he'd been owned, he just found a toilet plunger and played with that for a while.

I didn't get to make him cry though, like in all the other "How I owned a n00b" tales. Maybe if I'd given him a big wedgie as well I could have completed the picture.
Quote by The devil at the crossroads
E|-------------------------------------------1--
B|-----------------------------------1--4--
G|-------------------------1-3-4--
D|------------------1-3----
A|--------1-2-3----
E|-1-4-----

Just move it around the fretboard
#3
What's your point? There are so many people who pick up a guitar, pretending to know how to play, then just bashing. There is no such thing as 'owning' those people - they couldn't care less, namely.
Quote by The Leader
Same difference? Meaning its differences are exactly alike, and are parallel in opposite? So they have the exact same thing wrong with them. Two identical twins have scars, but the scars are in the exact same place, so their differences are the same.
#4
thats horrible
jumping on ANY bandwagon sucks
hes a 7 year old kid. its not his fault. he doesnt understand
your 24. its hardly considered "owning" someone if your that much older.
the whole concept of "owning" is pathetic and childish.
act your age

n00b pwr!
Quote by mr.happyman
so she took off my pants and was gonna give me dome (head). fukk yeah, free dome (head) (i'm used to hiring prostitutes).as she inched her head closer to my pen0r, she pulled her hand outta nowhere and sandpapered my mini mr.happyman!
#5
I'm hoping you're directing some kind of underhanded yet witty jibe at the people who claim to '0Wn |\|0ObS', cos that was a really pointless thing to do. It's stupid to take pride being better at guitar than someone who hasn't picked one up before, especially when he didn't say he was better than you. He's 7 dude, it's not hard to be better than a 7 year old.
"He remembered that they were but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return"
#6
Quote by mikb
I'm hoping you're directing some kind of underhanded yet witty jibe at the people who claim to '0Wn |\|0ObS', cos that was a really pointless thing to do. It's stupid to take pride being better at guitar than someone who hasn't picked one up before, especially when he didn't say he was better than you. He's 7 dude, it's not hard to be better than a 7 year old.


Wow, it took 5 responses for someone to actually get the Joke.

mikb gets a cookie.
Quote by The devil at the crossroads
E|-------------------------------------------1--
B|-----------------------------------1--4--
G|-------------------------1-3-4--
D|------------------1-3----
A|--------1-2-3----
E|-1-4-----

Just move it around the fretboard
#7
I think your the person who got owned by the little kid and your trying to sound cool by saying this online so people think, "Wow, he's cool, He beat a 7 year old".

Enough said.
Quote by demoniacfashion
Is there any black people on UG?
I don't think a lot of black people play guitar anymore.

Quote by Oasis-fanatic
they all kinda went extinct after hendrix really.


Needless to say, I lol'ed.

Quote by human panda
Appart from being on UG or wanking, thats what i mostly do
#9
Wow, you seem to be really proud of yourself... You really wanted to make him cry? C'mon! My brother is 7 years old and he cannot hold a goddamn guitar well! Stop saying you own him, because you don't.
Je parle français, excusez mon language inaproprié quand je m'exprime en anglais.

#11
you guys are all idiots. Cosimo's entire post was so obviously sarcastic that its barely funny.
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."-Duke
#12
He was kidding...bad joke though.

flickr you might
Quote by MrCarrot
Oranges are actually a revolution though - they're the next step from Rectos IMO.
#13
That was a lame joke, should have involved more vai t0tal! hxc shr3dd!ng.
And what was even more so lame was the fact you spazzes though he was serious. I mean, I think hitlers been dead for a while, other than that who would "pwn" a 7 year old?
#14
I lol'd.

+20 cool points.
Member of The Bass Militia. PM DinkyDaisy to join.
Co-Founding member of the Save the Funk club. PM jimmypage27 or me to join.
Founding Member of "Using gay as an insult proclaims your idiocy" club.
Member #11 of the UG RIP Cliff Burton Club
#15
It would seem most of the people here aren't more than 12 years old, even the person who understood it was questioning himself, - G
Follow me into the desert as thirsty as you are
I shot my love today would you cry for me
I lost my head again would you lie for me
I left her in the sand just a burden in my hand
I lost my head again would you
#17
this isn't spam. there are a number of people on this board that need to be reminded of how much "owning a noob" tales suck. Cosimo just so happened to articulate this message in a particularly creative and sarcastic manner.
#18
Quote by shizzybrane
this isn't spam. there are a number of people on this board that need to be reminded of how much "owning a noob" tales suck. Cosimo just so happened to articulate this message in a particularly creative and sarcastic manner.


Shizzybrane, Email me if you are ever in Sydney. You are most welcome at my house, where you'll find cold beers in the fridge, and friends to jam with.
Quote by The devil at the crossroads
E|-------------------------------------------1--
B|-----------------------------------1--4--
G|-------------------------1-3-4--
D|------------------1-3----
A|--------1-2-3----
E|-1-4-----

Just move it around the fretboard
#19
Well he could post that in one of the many existing threads about people "pwning".

I agree that it's stupid, but those threads take up enough of the forum without "anti-pwn" threads doing it even more.

A dwarf might hear you. What then?

My Music
#21
Quote by timi_hendrix
Well he could post that in one of the many existing threads about people "pwning".

I agree that it's stupid, but those threads take up enough of the forum without "anti-pwn" threads doing it even more.



Wasn't really intended as an Anti-Pwn thread, more an story about my evening, just changing the spin on it. I really did have a 7 year old have a go at jamming with us. We ended up fretting the strings for him and just getting him to do the strumming. Soooooo Cute. Then when me and my brother were improing spanish guitar, he danced around to it, in between trying to stick the toilet plunger on our heads or our guitars.

To James, the funniest thing all night was that when he pushed the plunger onto his tummy, it made a farting noise. He made us stop playing so he could demonstrate that a few times.
Quote by The devil at the crossroads
E|-------------------------------------------1--
B|-----------------------------------1--4--
G|-------------------------1-3-4--
D|------------------1-3----
A|--------1-2-3----
E|-1-4-----

Just move it around the fretboard
#22
Quote by timi_hendrix
Well he could post that in one of the many existing threads about people "pwning".

I agree that it's stupid, but those threads take up enough of the forum without "anti-pwn" threads doing it even more.


I concur.
#23
+2. TS u came off really bad in this.
time to delete this statement thread before it gets closed.
Jenneh

Quote by TNfootballfan62
Jenny needs to sow her wild oats with random Gibsons and Taylors she picks up in bars before she settles down with a PRS.


Set up Questions? ...Q & A Thread

Recognised by the Official EG/GG&A/GB&C WTLT Lists 2011
#24
Although your intentions are not without merit, you're basically fighting a fool's war.

This is like complaining because we have to breath oxygen.
Schecter C-1 Classic (Antique Amber)
Ibanez JEM 7VWH
Crate Palamino Class A tube combo
Digitech RP80 Multieffects pedal
Ibanez TS9 DX Tube Screamer