#1
Again, you'll be added to my critlist.

Juniper leaves bobbing
upon stormy waters.
Past the participle where dreams are made;
past the monks whose cry of “flagellum dei
ring true with the minds of the rotting.
The cardboard tree dangles over
with menacing limbs scraping the white-water
and ripples form and cease and form and cease.
Your opera posthuma line the banks
with pages dirtied and torn.
Cave!” shouted your doctor
to the man in the white coat.
And to his accusations, you merely replied,
Calix meus inebrians, said the cadavera vero innumera.”
#2
That was really well written, I wish I understood the latin, but the parts I did understand were much enjoyed.

It would be nice if I could offer some criticism but I have none.
#3
You still owe me

I had no idea what this was about.

"Past the participle" ruled.

Overall it was- pretty.

Crit me
Sig
#4
'a good shepherd shaves his sheep, he doesn't slay them'

sorry to ruin any surprises, but i just had to do it


i like the latin now and then, especially how you included them in your poem, nice job
Last edited by Mister.Y at Jan 29, 2007,
#5
Quote by Jammydude44
You still owe me

I had no idea what this was about.

"Past the participle" ruled.

Overall it was- pretty.

Crit me
Sig


You've got two little stars by your name.

^...You bastard.

^^^Thank you muchly.

My critlist shall be taken care of in the next 48 hours.