#1
Wired money goes absolutely know where.
$500 debt.
$510 debt.
$700 debt.
Stashed movies in the toilet hatch.
Frozen rolls of quarters in the icebox.
Chopped debit cards.
Five bank tellers getting rock hard.
$800 debt.

"I don't have much for you except mad love."
Mad love will get me a handful of shit
without a pot to throw it in.
$900 debt.
Goddamn!
My eyes are balance inquiries.
My TV set's gurgling ATM's.
Every blink is the "kachink" of tax collecting machines.
$1,000 debt.

Heaven's a rest stop.
Hell's a speedometer.
My financial statements make them both
look like pussies.
$2,000 debt.
Poor advice.
#2
Those are some weird lyrics man! "Heaven's a rest stop.Hell's a speedometer.My financial statements make them both look like pussies." I was rolling! I'd love to hear how this fits in a song, I can't imagine how it could work. If you already have done it, post a recording soon, "five bank tellers getting rock hard" that's too funny I have to hear this song, good luck
Quote by zackk
seriously though, listen to DaliLama.
Quote by Arthur Curry
My spidey sense tells me some mothafuckas are gonna be BANNED.
#3
I like. I'm in debt myself, and you summed it up very well.
"You can never quarantine the past."
#4
I really don't see how this could flow, but obviously they are pretty unorthodox lyrics so perhaps the song is the same way.

My eyes are balance inquiries.
My TV set's gurgling ATM's.
Every blink is the "kachink" of tax collecting machines.

I thought that was a pretty good few lines. The part about bank tellers getting rock hard is hilarious. Not much to else to say I guess lol.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=514641
We're only strays.
#5
I felt that this could have been a little longer actually, Randy. I don't think the impact of the last stanza was very large cause of this and because your longer pieces as of late have seemed to be a lot stronger than this. A good idea here, I would just like to see you expand on it a little more.
#6
Quote by streetcarp19
I felt that this could have been a little longer actually, Randy. I don't think the impact of the last stanza was very large cause of this and because your longer pieces as of late have seemed to be a lot stronger than this. A good idea here, I would just like to see you expand on it a little more.



I agree that it does kind of end, but that was somewhat intentional. Debt keeps growing and it never stays in one place too long before getting higher, so this is short in a ways to reflect that, but I agree in that it's a piece that could be expanded. I just don't know how.
Poor advice.
#7
Love those lyrics dude. If they are just random words strung together, who cares? Its fun to read.
#8
Quote by Pigdestroyer
Love those lyrics dude. If they are just random words strung together, who cares? Its fun to read.


They're not.
Poor advice.