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#1
I just took a massive dump! I mean, i was amazed it flushed, in kinda wobbled going down for a couple seconds, but it all went down in one flush.

So, my point is, what was the best poop you've ever had?

I usually like to name my poops, this one doesn't have a name yet, but if i had to i would have to call it awesome.


Describe the mood, were you angry? happy? sad? annoyed? or relieved because you've been constipated for the past two weeks?
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#2
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#3
i once did one, and it was still coming out when it went into the water.

i felt all empty after.

EDIT: my feeling was one of euphoria. i went into almost a trance for a second, like i was high or something was pretty weird. now i strive for that same feeling.
#5
someones gonna send a link to the website where you rate the turds....
why do i know about that lol
#6
You did something really great today. I can speak for all of us when I say that I am very proud of you.
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#8
Quote by pHaKe
I just took a massive dump! I mean, i was amazed it flushed, in kinda wobbled going down for a couple seconds, but it all went down in one flush.

So, my point is, what was the best poop you've ever had?

I usually like to name my poops, this one doesn't have a name yet, but if i had to i would have to call it awesome.


Describe the mood, were you angry? happy? sad? annoyed? or relieved because you've been constipated for the past two weeks?


i generally dont take detailed notes about my shits, but if i do rest assured you will be the first to hear all about it
#10
I lol'd.
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#11
Also, don't you hate it when it crashes into the water so fast it sprays your butt with murky toilet bowl water/piss. It always makes it harder to wipe, and then just becomes a tissuey mess.
"We are not concerned with motive, with higher ethics. We are concerned only with cutting down crime-."
#12
well i did have a massive poo once that actualy blocked up the toilet, it was like a huge freaking brown log (not orange that doesnt happen to often)
#13
Quote by GLP_Arclite
i generally dont take detailed notes about my shits, but if i do rest assured you will be the first to hear all about it


You don't keep a shit log?

I've kept one since 4th grade and i read through it sometimes and remember the good times.
"We are not concerned with motive, with higher ethics. We are concerned only with cutting down crime-."
#14
the submarine- it either hit the water so hard it disapeared completely or it tried cl;imbing OUT the toilet

man there is some f***ed up shit on here(ok its the pit)

EDIT: excuse the pun
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#16
Quote by pHaKe
Also, don't you hate it when it crashes into the water so fast it sprays your butt with murky toilet bowl water/piss. It always makes it harder to wipe, and then just becomes a tissuey mess.


I always throw a good amount of toilet paper in the bowl before I start to avoid that.
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#17
Quote by chiliman14
well i did have a massive poo once that actualy blocked up the toilet, it was like a huge freaking brown log (not orange that doesnt happen to often)


usually all of my lesser poos clog up the toilet, especially the ones that get stuck and take a whole roll of toilet paper to get off on anus... Then it just all rises to the top in a brown murkey pond. That's when i go into shit fighter mode, and try to keep it down before it spills over.
"We are not concerned with motive, with higher ethics. We are concerned only with cutting down crime-."
#18
I don't name my turds I name my flushes, some take ****in' ages. Last week it didn't properly flush it just had the before flush thing so the turd didn't flush. it was so awesome... I named it... mike
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#20
You are ****ing sick!
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#23
Quote by pHaKe
Also, don't you hate it when it crashes into the water so fast it sprays your butt with murky toilet bowl water/piss. It always makes it harder to wipe, and then just becomes a tissuey mess.


+1
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#24
Quote by pHaKe
You don't keep a shit log?

I've kept one since 4th grade and i read through it sometimes and remember the good times.


well i suppose a daily diary of shit would be a fairly eccentric hobby

Thursday: no shits today
Friday: i had an awesome shit today, i took a picture:



it was like shitting people

lol
#25
Quote by metallica_death
You are ****ing sick!


What? You don't name your shits?

Quote by fake_sk8r182
Pics?


i will next time, just for you, and name it after you
"We are not concerned with motive, with higher ethics. We are concerned only with cutting down crime-."
#27
I've had a couple of really thick long turds that have been impossible to flush..


I took a picture of one once, and I would upload it but nah.... I was drunk.
#28
Best dump? ummm, i'd have to say the one I took in Ft. Lauderdale's airport last year on my way home from the keys. I had been holding it in all weekend because the facilities in the keys weren't fit for christian buttcheeks. It was AMAZING! it took 5 flushes total, with a bit of a break and then I went in for round two like 10 minutes after I was done with the first wave.
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#29
usually ill take a picture of it with my phone and show it off if its good... id say the best one was a couple yrs back when i went to take the GED it was at some rundown alternative school.. really dirty.. i began to get hungry and was broke so i tried to get a buddy to gimme some potato chips.... he said hed give me a bag if i rawdogged this toilet (keep in mind it was a dirty no janitor type school really messy bathrooms and for those that dont know the term rawdog applies to shitting on a public toilet with no cover of toilet paper or not using a condom but thats another story) ANYWAYS the toilet had diarhea shit all in it and i wasnt permitted to flush it before hand (just in case it was a canon shit and it happened to splash muddy water all over my anal cavity. so i sat down on the seat and tried carefully not to splash my ass with who the fduck knows how old diarhea scum water.... everything came out nice and the turd was at least a foot long and coiled like a south american boa... i was proud so i of course didnt flush... anyways the potato chips were good as hell
#30
holy duude, I had the scariest shit EVER the other month

It was HUGE, I mean HUGE, about the size of a softball, I'd say (and they ARE pretty big). I was scared shitless, I was scared I'd do an Elvis and push too hard, and end up dying. So I was considering holding it in as best as I can and calling an ambulance, but I realised how embarrasing it would be...

In the end it just slipped out, painlessly, as if it wasnt even there. When I stood over the toiler and looked, I tell you, I nearly threw up, I could believe something as big and shitty as that was inside me
#34
one time, a counciler took a shit so big they couldnt flush it down
so my friends and i stood outside the door and charged people a dollar to see the monster crap
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#35
I once had a poop so big it couldnt fit, and it got half way out, and there was much pain and maybe even traces of blood

it was bloody scary, I was all post traumatised afterwards

...weird
#36
Quote by $Guitarist$
Why hasnt someone reported this already?


its mostly out of sheer disbelief at this thread's very existence
#38
Quote by pHaKe
Also, don't you hate it when it crashes into the water so fast it sprays your butt with murky toilet bowl water/piss. It always makes it harder to wipe, and then just becomes a tissuey mess.



Actually, I discovered a good way to avoid the "Back splash" from the water from watching olympic diving. Just make sure your back is completely vertical so your poo goes into the water straight and it won't splash.

Yeah.....
#40
Quote by ParticleManTMBG
Dude what's your problem?
This is funny.



The first couple of minutes it was funny. Then I realized how disgusting the joke is.
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