#1
hey folks i wrote this based on a dream i had about my girlfriend. let me know what you think.

Walkabout

(verse)
I’m gonna take you for a ride
Come along and sit by my side
I’ll take you places you’ve never been
Show you sights that you’ve never seen

Let’s go walkabout together
Don’t know where our feet will lead us to
Let us go now and follow blindly
Cause there is nothing quite like me and you

Yeah

(chorus)
Why don't we take this walkabout right now one step at a time
our feet will lead us there following blindly right behind
I’m with the woman that I love too much
Why don’t we walkabout together forever.


I've not quite finished it yet but would like to know what people think i should change or add to it.
Vintage VRS100 Custom 24
PRS SE Soapbar II Maple
Harley Benton HBR7-450FRBK (7 string)
Tanglewood Nevada FST 36
Hughes & Kettner ATS MKII
Vox Tonelab SE
Sennheiser E285 S
Danelectro free Speech Talk Box
Last edited by matchbox at Feb 5, 2007,
#3
I’m gonna take you for a ride
Come along and sit by my side
I’ll take you places you’ve never been
Show you sights that you’ve never seen
really simple and basic, jsut about every line in this verse has been used before,almost word for word

Let’s go walkabout together
Don’t know where our feet will lead us to
Let us go now and follow blindly
Cause there is nothing quite like me and you

Yeah

Why don't we take this walkabout right now one step at a time
our feet will lead us there following blindly right behind
I’m with the woman that I love too much
Why don’t we walkabout together forever.

its decent, its very simple, ur messenge is clear, but the first line of the 3rd verse is a bit to long in my opinion.6.9/10

crit my newest if u could
#4
that's actually the chorus lol. But thanks for the criticism i'll take it all into account. To be honest every song ever written has something similar to another song so......
Vintage VRS100 Custom 24
PRS SE Soapbar II Maple
Harley Benton HBR7-450FRBK (7 string)
Tanglewood Nevada FST 36
Hughes & Kettner ATS MKII
Vox Tonelab SE
Sennheiser E285 S
Danelectro free Speech Talk Box
#5
i like the idea of a walkabout... cool wording, its a bit too put together rhyme wise but you have a good start i def like the concept
bu§ta
#6
idea is good and yeah many of the lines has been used before i agree with u that every song has some resemblance to other songs but at the same time we also have creativity . thnx for the crt on mine . ur song had a good flow
Hi