#1
Brain picker

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but theres no ****in way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors y cant paper do this to people? Why arent sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why becausec paper cant beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, Im sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole
#2
I swear to God I've heard that somewhere.

Edit: You got that from maddox, didn't you?
Thus sayeth the Lord.

<//////>~
#6
lol, reminds me of the super bowl commercial.
Quote by Senor Kristian
Viking fact no. 1: Viking helmets did not have horn.
Viking fact no. 2: Vikings tobogganed on their shields into battle.
Viking fact no. 3: Vikings drank mead.
Viking fact no. 4: One of your ancestors are likely to have been raped by a viking.
#7
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
#9
Quote by Ubershall404
Brain picker

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but theres no ****in way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors y cant paper do this to people? Why arent sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why becausec paper cant beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, Im sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole


yea but seeing as paper doesnt 'constantly suffocate students' i wouldnt see how rock could constantly tear things up. it would obviousily require a moving living being to perform those actions for anything to happen.
#11
Paper represents money.
Rock represents hired brutes.
Scissors represents cunning people.

i CBF explaining the rest.
#13
Quote by Tyrannous

Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
#14
Quote by Tyrannous


and off Seinfeld...
Quote by Hellish_Wolf
I can see it now, in a year we will have kids walking up to girls "Hey baby, my career score on guitar hero is over 3 mill, ooooooh yeeah"



IS THAT SYRUP IN YOUR PANTS OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME??!!
#15
it should be dynamite with a cutable wick rock and scissors yes i stole that one from dmetri
paco's pink tacos home of the dirty sanchez
#16
Paper represents money.
Rock represents hired brutes.
Scissors represents cunning people.


that actually makes sense
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motorboat the clit you motorboatin' sonofabitch.
#17
you make sense, its funny but not original
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I think stone is either 7 or 14 lbs

Edit I'm gonna go with 14 because it's rather unlikely you're 56 pounds


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sounds like....u need a...

BAND MEETING!!!
#18
its a ****ing game you ****ing moron!!!!
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Pfft... I know a guy who didn't even masturbate until he was 18... now that's a late bloomer.
#19
yes!!! i knew it was demetri. my friends in goverment and photography and i wont stop with saying his stuff. fkin hilarious
#22
Quote by eternalgorias
Historical battles



Quote by Lord_Of_Dance.

I never understood why a girl would take a boner as a bad thing "Oh no, your attracted to me, you sick wanker." :\ x


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Im saying this the straightest way possible, but...

I'd have sexual intercourse with your anus.
#23
I reckon our version of the game is better
its called Mint Tooth Lamb
Mint beats Lamb
Tooth Beats Mint
Lamb Beats tooth
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9_11_4:
.


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...
I you 9_11_4, you like Chuck, Opeth, and don't mind porn, that = epic metul win.


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Ash, stop masturbating.
#24
Quote by musicianamedave
I swear to God I've heard that somewhere.

Edit: You got that from maddox, didn't you?


Its sounds like something he'd say, doesn't it?
Quote by iHurricaneGTR

Goats are like mushrooms.
When you shoot a duck,
I'm afraid of toasters.

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South Korea should have their Starcraft league members double as military strategists.
#28
Quote by Ubershall404
Brain picker

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but theres no ****in way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors y cant paper do this to people? Why arent sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why becausec paper cant beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, Im sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole

Wow, way to steal a joke from somewhere, post it here, and not give credit to anyone you ****ing jerk.