#1
Ok this is my first song I have ever written...needless to say it's not very good, or long. I wrote this song about my breakup with my ex-boyfriend. Any suggestions or comments are totally appreciated!


Sorry I couldn't be, what you always wanted
We are too different, I should have saw it
Soon enough I'll be gone, just leave me alone
Memories will fade away, i'll be left with nothing
Time's spent together gone, everything has gone wrong
Where we were once happy, is now just a dream
Lies and fights have torn us apart
Should've ended us right from the start

I'm moving on to something brighter
Done with fighting time for laughter
What was once good now is bad
Time to walk away and forget the past
Start over with someone knew
Forget the ways you made me come unglued
#2
It's quite good for a first song. It could flow a little better but the actual lyrical content is good.

Try splitting it up into verses and a chorus as well, rather than just a block of writing

Crite mine plz? (It's in my sig)