#1
I was talking to my friend about this, cuz both our parents went through divorces, and its hard to talk to kids ur age.

Honestly the last thing anybody wants to hear when they have a problem is "oh that sucks" or "im sorry." So what do you do to help people out in their time of need?
#4
Just shut up and listen. Give them honest advice if it seems like they're looking for it, or just keep your mouth shut if it seems like they just need to talk about their burdens.
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#5
Honestly like, i dunno. When people have a problem i guess i try to feel bad.

So i guess you can say 'things will get better' if its specifically about divorce.

My folks divorced when i was in 3rd grade, everythings good now.

So yea jus say itll be alright
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#6
Quote by schitz
Just shut up and listen. Give them honest advice if it seems like they're looking for it, or just keep your mouth shut if it seems like they just need to talk about their burdens.


Yup. Empathizing with the person is good too. Listening + honesty = best combo for helping people out with any sort of greif.

Quote by RB cam RB
When people have a problem i guess i try to feel bad.


You try to feel badly? That's ridiculous. If you don't care enough about the person to hurt knowing that they are hurt, then why the hell would you lie to yourself and them about it?

Quote by RB cam RB

So i guess you can say 'things will get better' if its specifically about divorce.

My folks divorced when i was in 3rd grade, everythings good now.

So yea jus say itll be alright


Also, most people really hate hearing 'it will get better'. Imagine someone said that to you at your lover's funeral or something? or after the death of a close friend. Speaking from expereince, I hate hearing that kind of total shit from people.
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Last edited by iain4444 at Feb 7, 2007,
#7
Quote by absinthe5765
I was talking to my friend about this, cuz both our parents went through divorces, and its hard to talk to kids ur age.

Honestly the last thing anybody wants to hear when they have a problem is "oh that sucks" or "im sorry." So what do you do to help people out in their time of need?


hhaha going through highschool i had alot of friends that were girls, and when your friends with girls, you always hear their problems... nonstop

the last thing anyone wants to hear is, wow that sux.. just like what absinthe5765 said. Alot of the time when a friend is feeling down they look to their friends for support, and sometimes you may have to sugar-coat what you say, becuase u dont want to upset or anger them anymore than they alrdy are.

what i try to do when im listening to my friends problems is to try and place my self in their situation, and think about what i would try to do to solve it. its alot easier said then done tho..
#8
If it's a "cry on the shoulder" kind of thing, just sit there, and look comforting. Well, not really. Actually give a shit. Talk it out.
If they want advice, give them advice. And be honest about it. If they seem to want this sort of thing, they dont want flattery or beating around the bush.
#9
just listen to their problems and give them as much advice as you can. be a good friend. it also helps a lot if you've actually been in the situation they have.
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#10
yea i have the same problem...i dont kno what to say to people besides that sux/im sry....then everyone things im not sensitive to people feelings so i look like and ass......i think im emotionally/socially retarded...
your once gentle words are bleeding from my eyes ,screams of terror now fill my every breath...
#11
feed them jellybeans they have made me happy tons of times
#12
Feed them jellybeans they have made me happy tons of times.
#13
Quote by Metallica_Ðuke
hhaha going through highschool i had alot of friends that were girls, and when your friends with girls, you always hear their problems... nonstop

the last thing anyone wants to hear is, wow that sux.. just like what absinthe5765 said. Alot of the time when a friend is feeling down they look to their friends for support, and sometimes you may have to sugar-coat what you say, becuase u dont want to upset or anger them anymore than they alrdy are.

what i try to do when im listening to my friends problems is to try and place my self in their situation, and think about what i would try to do to solve it. its alot easier said then done tho..


i went through the same thing in high school, i had a lot of friends that were girls, always listening to their problems, never bothered me much for some reason though, i guess u just listen and give honest advice, just try to do the best u can for them, guy or girl, even though none of my guy friends usually ever poured out their problems to anyone
#14
Quote by sk8r
Feed them jellybeans they have made me happy tons of times.

Swedish fish usually seal the deal.

Yeah about that guy above tho, never try to pretend ur sad. Honesty is the best. People come to u to talk to u, not an actor.
#15
Honestly, if I knew the answer to your question, most of my girl problems would be solved.
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#16
Quote by emokidsdelirium
yea i have the same problem...i dont kno what to say to people besides that sux/im sry....then everyone things im not sensitive to people feelings so i look like and ass......i think im emotionally/socially retarded...


me too
-[NiL]-
#17
My friend told me her dad has a bloodclot on his brain or something similar adn that he could die any moment, and I started tearing up and couldn't say must. Damn estrogen...I fail at emotional stuff.
#18
tell them they're being emo and they will be like "shit...you're right.....crap...ive gotta snap outa it!!"

problem solved
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