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#1
What are some of your most entertaining stories you've experienced, or ones you've heard, while high?

DISCLAIMER

1.) I know there's the Drug Thread, but it's mostly used for info adn questions, and has really died since bajeda has been really inactive lately.

2.) I don't give a flying fuck how bad you think most drugs are, I don't want to hear it. Some are bad, some are harmless, if you have ANYTHING to say to the effect of "Drugs are bad, and you're all idiots", just leave without posting.

3.) I haven't done anything of any sort, though I plan on trying some hash brownies and acid later on in life, so I'm not speaking from a user's standpoint, I'm speaking from a factual stand point, so don't come at with your, "Well you do it, so OF COURSE you'll stand up for it" bullshit.

[/disclaimer]

I heard a good one today, though.

My friend went into the woods with his friend who was smoking pot for this first time. They get done, and return to his basement where they sit on the couch and think.

While thinking, his friend's eyes lit up, and he said, "Duuuuude..... I could be a fucking artist!"

My friend looks at him, and asks "How?", the guy says, "I see a heard of elephants in a battle charrge with each other....*points*"

My friend sees that he's pointing at two arm chair facing each other, "I know they're chairs....but they could SOOO totall be elephants, I mean, put some horns...or tusks....or what ever those thigns are called, and paint it grey, it would be perfect..."

My friend was high as well, and he just laughed, but thoght his friend took it a little too seriously.



He told me this at luch today. I laughed pretty hard.

May not be the most entertaining story ever, but it's a start.
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Saxo-Walrus

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#2
Are YOU high?
Originally Posted by evening_crow
Quoting yourself is cool.


WARNING: I kill threads.
#4
Quote by guitar?
hey asshole this belongs in the drug thread


n00bs....


My friend tried to tango with me while he was high....it was entertaining until he tried to grab my balls.
#5
I dont have any druggie stories... cuz im not well experienced in drugs, meaning ive never touched one, yea i kno im a noob, but im 13, its probably a good thing i ahvent touched any right?

anyways i thot id say that evening_crow and guitar? should shut up...not that that helps anything, but i thot i'd say that....

yea im noob material...pwnage

EDIT: oh i just saw the last comment...^^ lol
#6
It doesn't have to be personal, like I said. It can be stories you've heard through the grapevine and such.

Quote by evening_crow
Are YOU high?


No, like I said, I don't do anything or tried anything.

And it was just the way he told it, I guess.
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Saxo-Walrus

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#7
One time after about 6 or 7 beers somebody came by that happened to have some mushrooms for sale, I was too drunk to realize that I was too drunk to be shrooming that night but I did it anyway and made the tea. Cut to one hour later and I can't see anything but swirling lights sweating my balls off puking out my entire digestive system huddled over the toilet as the tv in the next room seems as loud as a concert and all the word were scrambling like "oobla ma morphlec ranyetfur" and I'm thinking to myself oh my god everything about this life completely surreal and absolutely mind bendingly insane and then I start talking to this voice in my head and I'm like, "are you Jesus Christ?" and he's like "yes, god and I are god because we found a portal to peace through this chaos follow us follow us" and I'm just thinking oh my god i m talking to god and he's ****ing crazy like charles manson not at the time realizing that it was actually me that was crazy talking to myself and I'm yelling at my friends "jesus is real he's a space time traveller repent now man it's all chaos it's swirling madness in space" or something like that, anyway it was an absolute ball I can't wait to do it again.
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#8
haha

I don't know the exact appeal, but I love these stories.
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Saxo-Walrus

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#9
You wake up after having way to much weed in the middle of a field in the middle of nowhere and you are naked. Yeah that sucked but now I just think it was funny. Hahahahaha
#10
i watched a bee fly through a closed window...right through the glass
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#11
I thought that my one of my friends was a seal and another was a whale and they were ****ing each other. turns out people on the bus told me I was making all the noises and moving like I was a seal geting ****ed by a whale.
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#12
I got bad one for one yeah its really long, so this is what pretty much happend.

Got really really baked, was chillin in my room with buddys totally relaxed. Friend pretends he's dying calls the police then they phone back and i have to talk to them. totally killed my high.
#13
Couple of good ones...

I was outside with one of my buddies by a river, and was getting pretty baked... I looked around us, and on the other side of the river (its about a mile wide, little less maybe) and said "man have you ever noticed how many trees there are? They are everywhere..... What if they attack the humans.... We'd all be dead..." Anyways, about 5 minutes later I look up at the sky and I see a perfect smiley face of sky in the cloudy night. This at the time was the greatest thing I had ever seen, and it knocked my socks off. About 5 minutes later again, I looked up to the sky and saw that the smile had straightened out, the face was more square like, and it had developed a Hitler like mustache. "****ING SMILEY FACE IN THE SKY IS ACTUALLY HITLER FACE!!! OH MY GOD!!! RUN!!! WE HAVE TO KILL IT!!! THAT ASSHOLE IN THE SKY BETRAYED US!!! WE MUST ALLY WITH THE TREES, FOR THEY HATE HIM TOO!!!!!" So then we were allied with the tree army, and then I don't really remember anything else, it was so long ago.


Another story:
Me and my friend were walking back to his house stoned, and as we walked up to his front door I said "Dude you know we have to be really quiet when we go to your room"... We then fell on the ground and rolled around in laughter for at least 10 minutes.

And Final story:
I had smoked before going to a friends house, but I still smelled like smoke. My friends decided to keep me outside until I smelled less like smoke. I waited on the deck for a little while, which to me seemed like a jail cell... They then came out and told me they were going to take the smell off of me.. I trusted those assholes... They proceded to cover me in baby powder... I was covered in white flakes when they whipped out lightsabers and started beating me. Then they ran inside and locked the door and I was just like "what the **** just happened?". Then they ran out with cooking oil and spray on butter and sprayed that on me, which apparently has a bubbling reaction with baby powder.... It was not cool to see everything on me bubbling, and then they attacked me with windex and beat me with lightsabers some more... My friends are assholes.
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#14
Quote by DaliLama
One time after about 6 or 7 beers somebody came by that happened to have some mushrooms for sale, I was too drunk to realize that I was too drunk to be shrooming that night but I did it anyway and made the tea. Cut to one hour later and I can't see anything but swirling lights sweating my balls off puking out my entire digestive system huddled over the toilet as the tv in the next room seems as loud as a concert and all the word were scrambling like "oobla ma morphlec ranyetfur" and I'm thinking to myself oh my god everything about this life completely surreal and absolutely mind bendingly insane and then I start talking to this voice in my head and I'm like, "are you Jesus Christ?" and he's like "yes, god and I are god because we found a portal to peace through this chaos follow us follow us" and I'm just thinking oh my god i m talking to god and he's ****ing crazy like charles manson not at the time realizing that it was actually me that was crazy talking to myself and I'm yelling at my friends "jesus is real he's a space time traveller repent now man it's all chaos it's swirling madness in space" or something like that, anyway it was an absolute ball I can't wait to do it again.

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#15
Quote by goods2006
Couple of good ones...

I was outside with one of my buddies by a river, and was getting pretty baked... I looked around us, and on the other side of the river (its about a mile wide, little less maybe) and said "man have you ever noticed how many trees there are? They are everywhere..... What if they attack the humans.... We'd all be dead..." Anyways, about 5 minutes later I look up at the sky and I see a perfect smiley face of sky in the cloudy night. This at the time was the greatest thing I had ever seen, and it knocked my socks off. About 5 minutes later again, I looked up to the sky and saw that the smile had straightened out, the face was more square like, and it had developed a Hitler like mustache. "****ING SMILEY FACE IN THE SKY IS ACTUALLY HITLER FACE!!! OH MY GOD!!! RUN!!! WE HAVE TO KILL IT!!! THAT ASSHOLE IN THE SKY BETRAYED US!!! WE MUST ALLY WITH THE TREES, FOR THEY HATE HIM TOO!!!!!" So then we were allied with the tree army, and then I don't really remember anything else, it was so long ago.


Another story:
Me and my friend were walking back to his house stoned, and as we walked up to his front door I said "Dude you know we have to be really quiet when we go to your room"... We then fell on the ground and rolled around in laughter for at least 10 minutes.

And Final story:
I had smoked before going to a friends house, but I still smelled like smoke. My friends decided to keep me outside until I smelled less like smoke. I waited on the deck for a little while, which to me seemed like a jail cell... They then came out and told me they were going to take the smell off of me.. I trusted those assholes... They proceded to cover me in baby powder... I was covered in white flakes when they whipped out lightsabers and started beating me. Then they ran inside and locked the door and I was just like "what the **** just happened?". Then they ran out with cooking oil and spray on butter and sprayed that on me, which apparently has a bubbling reaction with baby powder.... It was not cool to see everything on me bubbling, and then they attacked me with windex and beat me with lightsabers some more... My friends are assholes.


why would you get high with assholes like that?
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#16
Quote by goods2006
Couple of good ones...

I was outside with one of my buddies by a river, and was getting pretty baked... I looked around us, and on the other side of the river (its about a mile wide, little less maybe) and said "man have you ever noticed how many trees there are? They are everywhere..... What if they attack the humans.... We'd all be dead..." Anyways, about 5 minutes later I look up at the sky and I see a perfect smiley face of sky in the cloudy night. This at the time was the greatest thing I had ever seen, and it knocked my socks off. About 5 minutes later again, I looked up to the sky and saw that the smile had straightened out, the face was more square like, and it had developed a Hitler like mustache. "****ING SMILEY FACE IN THE SKY IS ACTUALLY HITLER FACE!!! OH MY GOD!!! RUN!!! WE HAVE TO KILL IT!!! THAT ASSHOLE IN THE SKY BETRAYED US!!! WE MUST ALLY WITH THE TREES, FOR THEY HATE HIM TOO!!!!!" So then we were allied with the tree army, and then I don't really remember anything else, it was so long ago.


Another story:
Me and my friend were walking back to his house stoned, and as we walked up to his front door I said "Dude you know we have to be really quiet when we go to your room"... We then fell on the ground and rolled around in laughter for at least 10 minutes.

And Final story:
I had smoked before going to a friends house, but I still smelled like smoke. My friends decided to keep me outside until I smelled less like smoke. I waited on the deck for a little while, which to me seemed like a jail cell... They then came out and told me they were going to take the smell off of me.. I trusted those assholes... They proceded to cover me in baby powder... I was covered in white flakes when they whipped out lightsabers and started beating me. Then they ran inside and locked the door and I was just like "what the **** just happened?". Then they ran out with cooking oil and spray on butter and sprayed that on me, which apparently has a bubbling reaction with baby powder.... It was not cool to see everything on me bubbling, and then they attacked me with windex and beat me with lightsabers some more... My friends are assholes.



haha

The first and last are great. Sorry for the beating, but it's hilarious.

Another story from the same guy.

Well, no one was home, as usual at this time with his sister out and his mom at school (she's a teacher) and he decides to dip into his stash, get his little homemade bong, and light up.

Well, he's done, and as he's now stoned, he looks at the clock, not realising the time it takes to take full effect is around the time his mom comes home.

He flips, he realises, "Holy shit, EVERYTHING smells like weed!!!"

So he frantically gets ANYTHING that's aerosol and smells nice and starts scouring the house like a mentally disabled neat freak spraying everything in the house. Axe (Lynx in the UK) and Febreeze mostly were his choices.

He gets done with the inside and thinks "Oh no!! Outside smells too!", so he runs outside spraying the air and the trees thinking his mom will find out.

About 15 minutes after he's done, he puts on his sober face and greets his mom at the door.

She hesitates, sniffs and says, "Sure does smell nice."

He just looks at her, gives her a macho look, and says, "Yea, it's me..."



That's all he told me, he had to go back to class.

He's a really activce storyteller, though, lots of arms and hand actions, so he had me rolling.
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Saxo-Walrus

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#17
One time I was at my best friends house and we went out to his shed and got high. My friend then suggested that we ride this old haggard ass lawn mower he bought for a dollar from this guy he knows. The lawn mower is basically a mower deck with four little plastic wheels, a steel seat, and "custom" handle bars my friend made by welding two pieces of steel together. So we go out to his driveway which is concrete and he fires up the mower and tells me to get on it and me, being in a rather high state, agreed. I get on the lawn mower and he tells me it has a three speed transmission, forward, neutral, and reverse. I was so fucked up i wasnt paying attention to what he said and I just said yeah man whatever. I yank back on the shifter and it kicks into reverse and im like what the fuck so i kick it into forward real fast and the lawn mower stands completely up on the back wheels dumping me off onto the concrete right on my ass. I proceed to jump up as quickly as possible and all i could say was " Fuck that man". It was hilarious at the time.
#18
the lightsaber one is too funny
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#19
Quote by trio fan
why would you get high with assholes like that?


Well I was smoking with one of my friends, out of the 4 guys who were there. He took only a few drags and decided to leave. I finished the joint and smelled really strongly of smoke when we ended up at my friends house. The other 2 guys who don't smoke said I smelled too much like smoke and then told me to wait on the deck. I forgot to mention that when I asked for water one of them gave me the dog bowl as a joke and I picked it up thinking it was a normal bowl with water in it and I drank it. I don't know why I got high around assholes like that, I guess I'm just a dumbass.
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#20
i dont have anything other than the time a girl i was getting high with broke a 2 minute silence with "Donkey Kong"
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#21
these stories make me wanna try weed...just a little bit you know...just to say that ive done it.
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#22
Quote by walker-rose
these stories make me wanna try weed...just a little bit you know...just to say that ive done it.

dude... if you smoke it, your life isnt gonna be over
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Quote by Bladez22
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#23
Quote by walker-rose
these stories make me wanna try weed...just a little bit you know...just to say that ive done it.

Dont do it for that reason alone do it to opean up your mind I ussualy become a philosopher when Im high and some shit makes total sence
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#24
Quote by human-blasphamy
Dont do it for that reason alone do it to opean up your mind I ussualy become a philosopher when Im high and some shit makes total sence


Yeah but on occasion stuff that makes sense doesn't really make sense...

Another quick story:

I was just sitting there, stoned, staring at a wall... I then started laughing and thinking "Hey a rubber duck... woah... that makes sense"... It really made no sense at all, in fact there was nothing to make sense of.


Wow these are just coming to me, here is another one:

It isn't about me but one of my friends, it was his second or third time smoking and he was using the bathroom at a friends house and said "Mr. Whiskers" out loud and lost control of his "tool" and pissed all over the floor... Then he walked out and pretended nothing happened, and didn't tell us till the next day.


Another one:

Me and the same friend from the earlier story (the one at the river, no one better to smoke with than a good friend if you haven't noticed yet) were smoking in the same spot again. He looked up and said hey look at the moon. I thought he said "gnome", and when I turned around one of the houses right next to the place had a lawn gnome in the backyard... I was like HOLY SHIT IT'S A GNOME! He thought I said moon, and he said yeah it is so big and white... I spent the next 5 minutes trying to convince him that he was crazy and it was actually relatively small, compared to everything else in the world... and how we didn't really matter anymore than the gnome... and how it was infact green and not white.... We were then distracted by a few pieces of wood on anothers neighbors fence that resembled a perfect cross if you looked it at it from the right angle... It was kind of scary actually, I felt like jesus was watching me, and I kept telling him to go away because I was jewish and "I aint hittin none of dat shit yo"...
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#25
theres a movie with ben stiller where he writes for alf and when one of the fraky space things comes through the door when here is doing herion freaked me out. I thought it was trying to kill me and yelled **** YOU SPACE BITCH ILL KILL YOU WITH A PHALLOPIAN TUBE. My friends mom just stared at me. I think she might know we smoke weed.
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#27
Quote by JoshMartyr
drugs are bad


Prove how weed is bad
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#28
And LSD.

Or JUST ABOUT any other psychoactive.

The only ones that are TRULY awful are the ones that are physically addicting, and even some of those aren't ALL bad.

Just ask bajeda.

He'll steer you ignorance clear.
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Saxo-Walrus

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#29
Christ, it was sarcasm. Weed isn't bad. But its gay.

Oh my god, I'm so cool, I'm a druggie. I smoke mad chronic all day.. 420!!!l;ksrja..

Pussy. if you want to do drugs do heroin or speed. Cocaine or E at least.
#30
Quote by JoshMartyr
Christ, it was sarcasm. Weed isn't bad. But its gay.

Oh my god, I'm so cool, I'm a druggie. I smoke mad chronic all day.. 420!!!l;ksrja..

Pussy. if you want to do drugs do heroin or speed. Cocaine or E at least.


Like I said I do drugs to opean my mind. And Cocain and Herion are for idiots. why so something that will **** you up and become a physical addiction. and after 56548464446878976549876546878646 people have said that when posted drugs are bad they were being sarcastic it gets old fast.
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#31
Quote by JoshMartyr

Pussy. if you want to do drugs do heroin or speed. Cocaine or E at least.


oh shut the hell up. deerr you can only be l33t if you do drugs that will blow up your heart and turn you into a white trash pantywaste.

anyways. um. i watched barney's great adventure, arachnaphobia (and was convinced that there were a legion of ninjas surrounding this guy, turns out it was an aerial shot and they were actually leaves on a tree. even the sober people believed me though), i ate like 9 chicken salad sandwiches, got $40 worth of fast food between my two friends and me. the best was having a memory lapse for a few minutes, practically blacking out. then my short term memory totally disappeared and i'd go vegetable mid sentence.
#DTWD
#32
Quote by primusfan
the best was having a memory lapse for a few minutes, practically blacking out. then my short term memory totally disappeared and i'd go vegetable mid sentence.


.....haha

I'd love to see that happen. I've seen older people kind of drain off mid sentence, but to just stop would be kinda cool (as long as you weren't having a seizure or something. )
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Saxo-Walrus

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#33
Quote by BottleOfSmoke
i dont have anything other than the time a girl i was getting high with broke a 2 minute silence with "Donkey Kong"


Quote by goods2006


Wow these are just coming to me, here is another one:

It isn't about me but one of my friends, it was his second or third time smoking and he was using the bathroom at a friends house and said "Mr. Whiskers" out loud and lost control of his "tool" and pissed all over the floor... Then he walked out and pretended nothing happened, and didn't tell us till the next day....


Wow 2 of the funniest things i've read all day.
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#34
I just have one. Me and my friends got high and we were walking down some random street and I walked into someone's backyard because I thought it was magical, and my friends were all like "dude where's he going?" and then out of nowhere I burst out of the yard shouting "DUDE THAT GUY HAS A BACKYARD! RUN!! RUN! HE HAS A FRIGGING BACKYARD!" at the top of my lungs (keep in mind it was about 2am). My friends got so freaked out, partly because I was shouting so loud, and partly because they were afraid of the backyard, so we all started running down the street screaming "RUN FROM THE BACKYARD!" and eventually I just fell on the street and slept.
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#35
My friend smeared shit on my friends walls but he is an asshole
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#36
I remember one time i had just finished smoking at a friends house. i really had to go take a piss so as usual, i locked the door What my friends didn't tell me was that to open the bathroom door you had to press the whole door in, push in the little button, and twist really slow, and i was no way close of figuring this task out in my faded state. So i banged on the door a couple times but quickly gave up and started playing with my my friends little brother's bath toys. I ended up being set free like 30 minutes later because my friends left when they heard the bathroom door banging because they thought it was "the bathroom spirit" or some bullshit like that.
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#37
there is quite obviously an argument to be made for drugs being bad. It can sap your wallet, ruin relationships, and even kill you. BUT, that argument is only valid when the user allows them to control their lives.
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Quote by Bladez22
smoke, you get more awesome by the minute..... You have an epic beard, live near woods, listen to metal, grill stuff using makeshift bbqs out of old cans, and now we find out you have stabbed someone in the dick
#38
Quote by primusfan
then my short term memory totally disappeared and i'd go vegetable mid sentence.


that happened to me after eating hash brownies... i was beyond retarded. i was trying to tell my friend something that really should only have taken about 20 seconds, but after every 3 or so words i would completely forget what the hell i was talking about, and would have to stop and try and think really hard about what i was saying so i could continue speaking. it was so hard and it took me at least 5 minutes to make my point but it felt like half an hour.
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#39
Quote by ACG
I just have one. Me and my friends got high and we were walking down some random street and I walked into someone's backyard because I thought it was magical, and my friends were all like "dude where's he going?" and then out of nowhere I burst out of the yard shouting "DUDE THAT GUY HAS A BACKYARD! RUN!! RUN! HE HAS A FRIGGING BACKYARD!" at the top of my lungs (keep in mind it was about 2am). My friends got so freaked out, partly because I was shouting so loud, and partly because they were afraid of the backyard, so we all started running down the street screaming "RUN FROM THE BACKYARD!" and eventually I just fell on the street and slept.

that is probably one the funniest things i have read in my life
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#40
Was about 2 years ago when I was 17, me and two other buddies smoked about half ounce, so we're sitting in my buddies room, 1 of em is playing PS2 and the other just sitting reading a Guitar One book, I look over to the stereo hit play and Fixxxer by Metallica starts playing, and during the intro FOR ME I heard screaming and a highpitch screaming static that got higher and higher pitched until I literally hit the stop button, freaked out, not knowing what I heard, I look at my friends they are still doing what they're doing and I asked "did you guys fkin hear that shit?!" -- "naw man just the music and the game". Needless to say I was freaked out so I went home
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