#1
A young boy and his friend drew
a pink hopskotch court.
The rain came and it seemed to run
down the gutter forever.

A teacher called on a teenage kid
to come answer some math question.
He drew infinity on the blackboard.
He was wrong, his pale face blushed.

There's a white outline on the pavement
here, with four limbs, and in one spot,
some foreign red got mixed in.
I walk past, it only takes a moment.
#2
i like it, but i feel like it needs
just one more thing at the end.

i feel like you need a BIT more closure.
it just seems to suddenly stop right there,
and i think one more stanza or even just
one more line could fix that and give closure.

buttttt. good job. i still really liked it.

I just want to sleep forever.


#3
Quote by Grovermans
i like it, but i feel like it needs
just one more thing at the end.

i feel like you need a BIT more closure.
it just seems to suddenly stop right there,
and i think one more stanza or even just
one more line could fix that and give closure.

buttttt. good job. i still really liked it.

Right, it just dosen't seem complete, but the whole idea of tying these things together through chalk is pretty unique. Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=527040
I'm a rockstar without the skills, fame, or income.


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