TheDarkestNights
UG Addict
Join date: Oct 2005
3,034 IQ
#1
Hey.

This was born out of a lack of ideas, me starting to tab out the intro to "Bleeding Mascara"
(well, the first four notes ) slowly, then just adding from there.

It's quite simple, but I like it. Oh, and sorry about the empty bars at the end.

If you leave me a crit, add in a link to your work and I'll be happy to crit yours

EDIT: That riff at the end shouldn't be there . I don't like it at all, so ignore it.
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Attachments:
Intro_1.zip
R E G G A E
Last edited by TheDarkestNights at Feb 17, 2007,
buckethead_jr
Registered User
Join date: Jan 2006
6,792 IQ
#2
wow, that was actually really good. Loved it all the way through.
The only things i would say are: On bar 7, you end on a note that is an odd interval away from the root note which leaves it sounding awkward, i would maybe change that note to a B.
And the bends in bars 8-9 on the 17th fret sound IMO better as full step bends instead of half-step, but that's just my opinion.

So, i pretty much can't find anything negative about it, loved the riff at the end aswell.
But, one way you could improve is to add more things like dynamics to prevent it from being 1 dimentional if you know what i mean, but it sounds great as it is.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=527510

EDIT: Thanks for the crit mate
Last edited by buckethead_jr at Feb 17, 2007,
ch715dallat
BTBAM=Godly
Join date: Jun 2006
3,466 IQ
#3
as a solo that was great but i wouldnt make it any longer than that, i was very good tho you should just jump straight into a real heavy chunky riff there straight after the solo that would be class. you got the skills at solo check mine out the 2nd one i have no solo done maybe you could help.
walkinbazooka
BRB Bulking
Join date: Aug 2006
593 IQ
#4
Ooh I like it man. Especially when the rhythm guitar picks up, that's nice.

You have a pretty good sense of melody, man.
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