#1
okies, not really much point replying to this if you're still at school, this is for sixth form and beyond.

basically, i'm in a lot of trouble with college at the moment (i'm in year 13, second year of sixth form, so don't get confused, americans )

i'm on the verge of being kicked out (again...lol), and am currently fielding various irate phone calls from my form tutor (i thought it was against policy for them to use my mobile number, but apparently it only matters if i break the rules, not them) and my dear mother, and i'm feeling a little scared of what's going to happen to me. i don't especially want to go to university anymore, i don't honestly care if i get A levels or not, but i've been pretty much coerced into being the "intelligent girl who does well and doesn't ever screw up". obviously, any of you who know me will know that this isn't me at all.

anyways, the point of this was basically...who else is/was/will be in my situation? what did you do? what happened? what are you doing now? make me feel better about messing up!


edit: my typing fails also <.<
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#2
You just gotta explain to your mum that this isn't what you want to do. My mum was the same way, along with most of my teachers. I told them that I didn't want to go to University and they all pretty much abused me.
When I'm successful doing what I want, I'll show them all up. Especially seeing as though if I get employment off my Advanced Diploma, my starting wage is more than my parents AND teachers
"Everybody, one day will die and be forgotten. Act and behave in a way that will make life interesting and fun. Find a passion, form relationships, don't be afraid to get out there and fuck what everyone else thinks."
#3
Quote by the_random_hero
You just gotta explain to your mum that this isn't what you want to do. My mum was the same way, along with most of my teachers. I told them that I didn't want to go to University and they all pretty much abused me.
When I'm successful doing what I want, I'll show them all up. Especially seeing as though if I get employment off my Advanced Diploma, my starting wage is more than my parents AND teachers



that's cool, and probably what i'll end up doing. thing is, i know i'm going to get absolutely mauled for this, because my mum is having, ah, "issues" with my sister, and seems to take it personally when i do something she dislikes. i feel sort of selfish, really.

she seems to think that having a degree is the way forwards, but being an artist i don't honestly feel that being forced into another competitive environment with other people who want to do the same thing as me is going to do anything other than turn me into more of a social retard. i'm not a competitive person, but i'm expected to always "win" and "do better" than everyone else. how do i explain that i don't want to be like that, without hurting anyones feelings, and without causing a whole tonne of drama?
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#4
I'm pretty sure they are allowed to use your mobile. When we started we had to write it on our 'student contract'.
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#5
Quote by big duck
I'm pretty sure they are allowed to use your mobile. When we started we had to write it on our 'student contract'.


i've only given my mobile number to my art teacher for when we had an art trip to holland. on the form i wrote it on it said "this number will only be used in emergencies relating to the trip". yay, college, right?
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#6
its not compulsory, so if you dont want to do it dont. i would think about it long and hard though.

there isnt long to go now, only a couple months. personally i would stick with it, whats the use in giving up now after nearly 2 years? and after those couple months, you should have some decent qualifications.
#7
just because you go to university doesnt mean you have to be really competative and 'beat' everyone else. you can go there and just do something you really enjoy. You say your an artist so take an arts based course. You mayaswell use what you've got to get a qualification and enjoy it in the process. And as for the social aspect, not everyone at uni is going to be competative and like that. You'll no doubt meet people more like yourself. At the very least, i'd just slog out the rest of the year and get decent A levels so that you can change your mind if need be. You dont have to go to uni straight away, take a gap year and then apply if you want, get some real world experience and you could have a different outlook in a year. thats what I did
Quote by Tim618


I was balls deep in this girl once, and shes like "Oh my god, thats such an excruciating pain!"

I say: ... "excruciating? Thats a pretty big word for a 12 year old."
#8
Quote by jimharvey2k
just because you go to university doesnt mean you have to be really competative and 'beat' everyone else. you can go there and just do something you really enjoy. You say your an artist so take an arts based course. You mayaswell use what you've got to get a qualification and enjoy it in the process. And as for the social aspect, not everyone at uni is going to be competative and like that. You'll no doubt meet people more like yourself. At the very least, i'd just slog out the rest of the year and get decent A levels so that you can change your mind if need be. You dont have to go to uni straight away, take a gap year and then apply if you want, get some real world experience and you could have a different outlook in a year. thats what I did


yeah, i see your point, but i'm not going to get all the grades i need anymore. i just have NO motivation whatsoever; i haven't done anywhere near enough work for art or english lit., and i'm falling behind in philosophy because i just...can't seem to care about it at all. just strikes me as a load of people arguing about complete shit. thing about uni is, i don't work well around other people - i'm very, very shy, and hate working around people. i don't like being in a situation where people can tell me what they think of me and my work to my face. i realise how pathetic that sounds, but it's the way i am. so uni really scares me...i mean, i can't wait to get away from home and do something, but having to concentrate on getting A levels, then a degree, surrounded by people who are going to be doing the same as me...maybe i'm paranoid, but that really frightens me.

i'm not entirely sure how to explain this to my college and my mum without earning myself their disappointment and annoyance. let's say, they're not...the most open minded people i've ever met.
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#9
College is free and voluntary. The fact that your form tutor is angry and calling you is probably causing you to hate it. She has no right to be angry.
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#10
Quote by Rankles
College is free and voluntary. The fact that your form tutor is angry and calling you is probably causing you to hate it. She has no right to be angry.



actually...that's a damn good point. she'd be out of a job if it weren't for people like me. she has no right to be angry at all.

actually, i think she might be a little...out of touch with modern teaching. she was my art history tutor (before i dropped it <.< and she said to me once "you piss me off so much! i could kill you right now! and i bet you haven't done the work, which is ****ing annoying too." so i handed over the work and ran off to cry my eyes out, lol.

maybe it's just essex. full of effing idiots. well, if i'm not online for a few days/weeks/months you'll all know it's because i've had my arms and legs broken by my psychotic form tutor...note to the sane: avoid colchester.
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#11
Alright Esther, I see you making a lot of same mistakes here.

1. (and you know this) Other people's expections are really unimportant. If you don't want to be competitive, have strait A's, whatever, then don't.

2. At the same time, failing out far and away a difference from getting strait A's. Don't cite "oh I don't want to be competitive" as a reason for failing. It's a red herring. Admit the fact that you are failing because you are not doing your work. Stop being lazy and don't lie to yourself or others.

3. If you don't like getting crap for you decisions don't allow yourself to take it. Just remain unreachable or busy. Learn to hang up the phone. Arguing about it never prevents you from recieving said crap. Just go about your own life. Take up a hobby that does not involve sitting in your room playing your guitar or playing on the internet.

4. Stop complaining about the cell phone. a. your tutor is trying to help you, and b. it has nothing to do with you failing out. It's another red herring.

5. In reference to 2 and 4 above, recognize that it is common for people to try to find reasons and exasperations for whatever ill befalls them. But don't let yourself start BELIEVING in those reasons and exasperations.

6. Start hitting the books and not fail out. There are plenty of people who have excelled in every field without formal education. There are plenty of ways to excell in life without formal education. But you know what, it never hurts to have it to a. fall back on, and b. support any other qualities you may be trying to show off in any future situation. Get the damn degree, it wont take that long anyway, and you'll feel a lot better.

7. I have done all of the above and then some. I shaped up, stop being a douche about my responsibilities, and got my BA (with a C average I might add cause I was a lazy ass.) Got into grad school, got my masters and my phD (much better average cause I wasn't a child anymore.)

8.Formal education does not mean formal life style. I got a doctorate under my belt, and in a few years will go back for more school. Do you know what I do for a living now? 3 days a week I teach kindergardners English, and 2 days a week I do fashion shoots (yes male model, not gay thankyou stfu.) Why? Because I want to a. Learn Japanese and B. Surf. So thats what I do all the time before and after work. Speak Japanese with the Japanese and go surfing. I'm a bum with a 25 year old car (and I'm only 26) and a 300 dollar a month apartment with no fridge or AC/heater or TV. I'm just having fun in life right now. So, don't think that getting an education for use as a tool to get jobs, internships, certifications wtfever later in life means you have to live and be that way.

9. I play guitar and bass. I suck at both, but love doing. Just thought you might want to know.

The good news, you can pull it out if you put a little work into it this session. Not fail, and you won't be called a failure or feel like one. It may even help you out one day. Now, its friday so get off the internet, stfu, and go get a beer. Time to enjoy the weekend (make sure do your school work too!)

Edit note: Don't worry though. Some stuff may annoy your, some stuff may bore ya, but hey, it's better than workin at McDonalds right? And just so we are clear, all of the above is tongue in cheek and being typed with a smile on my face. Don't feel like I'm using angry tone typing
Last edited by Imp at Feb 23, 2007,
#12
Quote by esther_mouse
yeah, i see your point, but i'm not going to get all the grades i need anymore. i just have NO motivation whatsoever; i haven't done anywhere near enough work for art or english lit., and i'm falling behind in philosophy because i just...can't seem to care about it at all. just strikes me as a load of people arguing about complete shit. thing about uni is, i don't work well around other people - i'm very, very shy, and hate working around people. i don't like being in a situation where people can tell me what they think of me and my work to my face. i realise how pathetic that sounds, but it's the way i am. so uni really scares me...i mean, i can't wait to get away from home and do something, but having to concentrate on getting A levels, then a degree, surrounded by people who are going to be doing the same as me...maybe i'm paranoid, but that really frightens me.

i'm not entirely sure how to explain this to my college and my mum without earning myself their disappointment and annoyance. let's say, they're not...the most open minded people i've ever met.


I can see where your coming from, and it is hard slogging away in A levels your not necessarily enjoying. what grades are you on course to get? and I wouldnt worry about the amount of work involved in most art courses at uni (maybe except english lit, and thats just reading) they're not intense like science based courses. I also know what you mean about disappointment, but i really think these people just want you to achieve potential that they see in you, even if the harassment is abit harsh/thorough. As for uni, you wont be living with people doing exactly the same things, thats the point, its a great mix up of people and you dont have to be anything you dont want to, its a great new start.
Quote by Tim618


I was balls deep in this girl once, and shes like "Oh my god, thats such an excruciating pain!"

I say: ... "excruciating? Thats a pretty big word for a 12 year old."
#13
Quote by jimharvey2k
I can see where your coming from, and it is hard slogging away in A levels your not necessarily enjoying. what grades are you on course to get? and I wouldnt worry about the amount of work involved in most art courses at uni (maybe except english lit, and thats just reading) they're not intense like science based courses. I also know what you mean about disappointment, but i really think these people just want you to achieve potential that they see in you, even if the harassment is abit harsh/thorough. As for uni, you wont be living with people doing exactly the same things, thats the point, its a great mix up of people and you dont have to be anything you dont want to, its a great new start.



well, for AS, i got an A in fine art, a B in english literature and a C in philosophy (and a U in maths but we'll ignore that one, 'cause i got an A at gcse...), so i'm expected to get roughly the same for A2, maybe improving on philosophy.

i'm just finding it really hard to see why i should do what other people want me to...yeah, i know i'm bright, i know i can get three A's and go to an awesome uni, but out of the six universities i've applied to, only one has accepted me, and four have rejected me. i'm still waiting to hear from the other one. it's just...i know i'm good at art (not to sound arrogant), i know i'm not stupid, but i HATE having people tell me to do this, do that...and yet still be an individual. yeah, sure, i have my own writing style, i have my own way of painting or speaking...but how can i do any of that properly if they're telling me what to say? and being rejected by universities is rather painful for me. i'm little miss grammar school girl, i'm used to being accepted intellectually, if not socially.

i think the thing is, i'm just really, really shy and not very confident anymore. the last couple of years have changed me a lot, and being in a situation where i have to "perform" in some way scares me. which is why...i hate all this so much, and don't know what to do. in an ideal world, i'd live miles away from anyone, just doing what i do, and not having anyone else try and get me to do what they want instead and act disappointed if i do something different.

ergh, i'm going on a bit here. thanks to everyone who's replied, it's honestly helped me a lot, just knowing that someone else agrees with me in any way at all, and i'm not just going completely insane and abandoning my future lol.
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#14
Quote by esther_mouse
well, for AS, i got an A in fine art, a B in english literature and a C in philosophy (and a U in maths but we'll ignore that one, 'cause i got an A at gcse...), so i'm expected to get roughly the same for A2, maybe improving on philosophy.

i'm just finding it really hard to see why i should do what other people want me to...yeah, i know i'm bright, i know i can get three A's and go to an awesome uni, but out of the six universities i've applied to, only one has accepted me, and four have rejected me. i'm still waiting to hear from the other one. it's just...i know i'm good at art (not to sound arrogant), i know i'm not stupid, but i HATE having people tell me to do this, do that...and yet still be an individual. yeah, sure, i have my own writing style, i have my own way of painting or speaking...but how can i do any of that properly if they're telling me what to say? and being rejected by universities is rather painful for me. i'm little miss grammar school girl, i'm used to being accepted intellectually, if not socially.

i think the thing is, i'm just really, really shy and not very confident anymore. the last couple of years have changed me a lot, and being in a situation where i have to "perform" in some way scares me. which is why...i hate all this so much, and don't know what to do. in an ideal world, i'd live miles away from anyone, just doing what i do, and not having anyone else try and get me to do what they want instead and act disappointed if i do something different.

ergh, i'm going on a bit here. thanks to everyone who's replied, it's honestly helped me a lot, just knowing that someone else agrees with me in any way at all, and i'm not just going completely insane and abandoning my future lol.


rejections from uni, I can sympathise, I got rejected by all 4 med schools last year without even interviews, but i slogged away, have had a year off to do what I like and now i'm just waiting to have my 4th interview out of 4 this year. A lot can change in a year, and I think i've found myself abit more in this gap year. Just dont give up. You dont have to be 3 a's just because someone says you do, just do your best. And you dont have to be by yourself to just do what you want, **** everyone else
Quote by Tim618


I was balls deep in this girl once, and shes like "Oh my god, thats such an excruciating pain!"

I say: ... "excruciating? Thats a pretty big word for a 12 year old."
#15
Where to start..

I'm going to a local community college..just started my 2nd year

Anyways math was never a strong point but this college has a requirement for it and other classes.

So I'm fighting though math but doing well with other classes.

My main reason of going to college was because the rules were different to get your electrical licence last year and now that they changed I may drop out of class and go work full time as I don't need college.

My parents really want me to stay but they are starting to think about letting me drop out since they know I don't need it anymore
They are paying for me to go and wouldn't mind saving the money anyways...
#16
I'm not going to preach or anything, all i'm going to say is good luck with whatever decision you make i hope it's the right one.
#17
Yeh im in your position now. also yr13 I got took out of lesson last week cuz i havn't started any of my coursework yet. Spent the week recording music i can't be arsed with 6thform anymore especially since i got took of ema for forging all the signatures. Now i don't get paid to go i really don't care if they kick me out. My advice, which you probably shouldn't take, is don't worry about the future because it will all sort itself out with little effort from your part. Or i could end up hanging myself as i have no grades no job and little prospects in life! but that will never happen as long as i got my guitar.
yeh that was no help to u at all.....
good look for the future!
#18
Quote by moody07747
Where to start..

I'm going to a local community college..just started my 2nd year

Anyways math was never a strong point but this college has a requirement for it and other classes.

So I'm fighting though math but doing well with other classes.

My main reason of going to college was because the rules were different to get your electrical licence last year and now that they changed I may drop out of class and go work full time as I don't need college.

My parents really want me to stay but they are starting to think about letting me drop out since they know I don't need it anymore
They are paying for me to go and wouldn't mind saving the money anyways...


yeah, i guess it's just a matter of time and waiting for my mum to realise that it's making me unhappy, and trying to convince the college not to be complete dick'eads.


Quote by Burningritual
Yeh im in your position now. also yr13 I got took out of lesson last week cuz i havn't started any of my coursework yet. Spent the week recording music i can't be arsed with 6thform anymore especially since i got took of ema for forging all the signatures. Now i don't get paid to go i really don't care if they kick me out. My advice, which you probably shouldn't take, is don't worry about the future because it will all sort itself out with little effort from your part. Or i could end up hanging myself as i have no grades no job and little prospects in life! but that will never happen as long as i got my guitar.
yeh that was no help to u at all.....
good look for the future!


you'll do alright, you still love playing your guitar. don't do anything silly, it's REALLY not worth the pain.


Quote by Draken
I'm not going to preach or anything, all i'm going to say is good luck with whatever decision you make i hope it's the right one.


cheers <3
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#19
You're on the last stretch of Sixth Form and you're gonna throw it away? In my opinion, that's fairly pathetic. All you gotta do is STFU and knuckle down for just a few small months, and then you'll have a decent set of A Levels. If every time you don't like something in life you give up, you'll never get anywhere.

If you don't wanna go to Uni after that, that's fine, but at least get the A Levels.
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#20
To be honest with you it is your decision and entirely up to you to choose what you want to do. However like TeenBite said, you are on the last stretch, finish the year and then don't go to uni. At least you have completed school and it will look better on your CV than something saying you didnt finish your A levels. Employers will think you lack commitment
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Quote by Teh Traineez0rz
You idiot....you set your hair on fire for a dollar.

Did you buy some intelligence afterwards??
#21
Quote by KillEmAll
To be honest with you it is your decision and entirely up to you to choose what you want to do. However like TeenBite said, you are on the last stretch, finish the year and then don't go to uni. At least you have completed school and it will look better on your CV than something saying you didnt finish your A levels. Employers will think you lack commitment



tbh, that's exactly WHY i don't want to do these stupid fucking things. i don't see why the hell i should waste my time doing something i hate just so i get some more bits of paper with letters stamped on them to show i'm "intelligent enough to work". i hate all the bureaucracy, in short. it's so idiotic. i would rather live in a shitty house and have a shitty job based on what i'm really like than have people stuffing paperwork down my throat and telling me i'm not good at anything unless some pretty certificate says i am.

*takes a deep breath*

i'm just panicking slightly about how my mum is going to react. i know she's going to blow it all out of proportion and ask me some ridiculous questions ("are you on drugs?" is always a classic), and the thing is, i feel so damned guilty, because she wants me to be exactly what i'm not. but college and the prospect of university are making me really, really unhappy, and the way it seems to me is that i either have a complete breakdown or i quit college and make everyone else feel like shit because i'm not "good enough".

...anyway, yeah...
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
#22
Go to Holland and work the streets

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#23
Have you ever had a job? Like in retail? Whenever I start to think why am I doing this, spending all this time and money, I look at my alternative. Working two jobs in retail, one full time, one part time, because I've got nothing but a HS degree, which isn't worth jack squat in the job market beyond unskilled labor.
#24
Quote by FrenchyFungus
Go to Holland and work the streets




SHHHH <.<

don't start that again

Quote by Symphonic Waves
Have you ever had a job? Like in retail? Whenever I start to think why am I doing this, spending all this time and money, I look at my alternative. Working two jobs in retail, one full time, one part time, because I've got nothing but a HS degree, which isn't worth jack squat in the job market beyond unskilled labor.



i worked in a guitar shop for a little while. all i did was clean, tune, and make tea. lol, but i honestly don't mind a mundane job like that, because it means i can not worry about pleasing other people during the day, and can be myself the rest of the time, doing what i do best.

only problem being income. i have expensive tastes <.<
MEMBER OF THE LAUGAM BRITISH HIT SQUAD! HONORARY MEMBER OF THE SWEDISH LAUGAM HIT SQUAD!
I'M JUST SEE THROUGH FADED, SUPER JADED, AND OUT OF MY MIND
<//////>~ dA
Esther is officially awesome and smart - Frenchy
Last edited by esther_mouse at Feb 23, 2007,
#25
Quote by FrenchyFungus
Go to Holland and work the streets




I'm sick of college and i've only been there half a year so i can only imagine what its like for you having been there a year longer than me.

I'd say just finish college and if you don't want to go to uni thats fine. I don't plan on going either. Woot for becoming a white-collar worker for the rest of my life.

Good luck.

EDIT: And as frenchy inferred (or i think he inferred) you could always become a high class call girl.
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