#1
Crit for crit, guys!

We live in this brutal cage,
This race for our insignificant survival
And is that what we are living for?
Money, glory, and reputation?


Chorus:
Why is it like this?
Why do I feel like screaming?
Where am I heading to?
Suicide? That’s the only saviour?

But when I’ll stop, they’ll carry on
And accelerate to the leading position
Until they’ll realize
That the race doesn’t cost a word.

I want to close my eyes,
And feel that something changed
Around me. This race for
money Will come to an ugly end
And they will learn how to live.
#2
We live in this brutal cage,
This race for our insignificant survival
And is that what we are living for?
Money, glory, and reputation?
insignificant is to long of a word, doesnt fit

Chorus:
Why is it like this?
Why do I feel like screaming?
Where am I heading to?
Suicide? That’s the only saviour?
chorus is pretty bland,nothing really grabs my attention

But when I’ll stop, they’ll carry on
And accelerate to the leading position
Until they’ll realizetry changing they'll to they
That the race doesn’t cost a word.
not bad, but the flow is a bit chppy, but not that much

I want to close my eyes,
And feel that something changed
Around me. This race for
money Will come to an ugly end
And they will learn how to live.
ugly is kinda blunt, try using more descriptive word


ok, its decent for a song, but nothing stood out to make it memorable.
the flow was choppy throughout, try fixing it. if u dont kno about flow, just let me kno, ill try to help u out.

leave a short crit on 'untitled' in my sig, if u could