Poll: Vote ***hoes!
Poll Options
View poll results: Vote ***hoes!
Untitled
0 0%
I Caught You Spirit-moth!
6 100%
View
0 0%
Voters: 6.
#1
"Untitled"

I'm lying down on the cold dirt
watching the bats fly around the pier.
Bodies litter the beach in front of me.

I walk down to the ocean
and fall into the water,
I hate the taste of the sea.
I also hate the repeditive
sound of the crashing waves.

*coughcough*
I stare into my reflection
and through the blood,
I can see tears.



I Caught You Spirit-moth! Now Give Me Your Gold!

I followed a pair of wings through a magnified memory, taking note in my ears of
Falling hemlocks, birch bark, and oaks,
As they beat the dust out of the dry leaves and smelled of cinnamon.
[They reminded me of soaked forest moons]
Half-hearts hanging like shrouds covering menagerie twinkle – nothing else could
Be heard that night.
I watched again as the flutter darted and I snapped under the pressure of the solstice,
Still howling, still tasting, lips still puckered,
Still feeding off the deceased wing beat,
And I sense the sky still weeping, still throbbing, sun kissing me asleep.




View


Act I:
Turn the clock over and remove the batteries, to ensure that it will not ruin this scene. The constant beating of its fragile hands was just an irritation, and we will climb back into position. Now, we will no longer move again. Put this on your ‘fridge to fade and yellow, yet never to age.

Act II:
Though fading with these framed memories,
sight has proven less fatal, as the words are
Spelled-out in short single syllable explicatives.
I have been learning to read Braille,
with both fingers and ears.

Act III:
Remember that first day out of jail?
Leaving. Everything changed,
no longer stale, no longer suppressed.
Just open and just free.
This was a scent I missed
for nine long months.

Act IV:
I remember a girl, years ago. I took her to a dance, she was my first love, as cliché as that sounds. I remember every time I wrapped my arms around her, every touch of her dress. I remember that feeling, it was soft, and in this case seductive, leading my hands. Her dress was static, lending shivers to my spine, drawn straight through my fingers.

Act V:
It hits me every time. Like the night, it sweeps over me.
Self-indulgence, and I know I can’t stop.
It’s an addiction in a way. Every ounce that I ingest
is revitalizing, energizing, and has the weakest crash.
I don’t see a downside, and won’t.
Until all my teeth have rotted out.

Act VI:
Subconsciously I am drawn, a positive ion, and I always said she was negative. This is so close to love, so close to love, well at least my romantic image of it. Forever drawn towards a source, yet never quite knowing why. I guess it is also a little bit like life, constantly being drawn towards death. I guess I am just a paperclip.
Filth, pure filth... That's what you are.
Last edited by The Hurt Within at Mar 6, 2007,
#2
The last one is the worst thing ever written, so I caught you spirit moth!.
Quote by Cal UK
Alk hit the nail on the head there.
#3
what theh ell is going on? i didnt write the first half of that untitled piece, and my title was Twenty Seconds...
#4
**** sake. kk


Teg, I moved yours into Poll A, I stuck them all into word pad and they kinda blended. My bad, Sorry man.
Filth, pure filth... That's what you are.
Last edited by The Hurt Within at Mar 6, 2007,
#7
Quote by punchupatatigge
I'll ****ing kill you.



Hahah bring it!
Filth, pure filth... That's what you are.
#8
Quote by stratkat
It's yours, isn't it.


sadly yes.
Quote by Cal UK
Alk hit the nail on the head there.
#9
i really didn't like number one.
number three was alright,
but i liked number two more.

SO. two.

I just want to sleep forever.


#10
I think this is the weakest grouping of the competition. I don't know which one to vote for. I'll look them over again in a little while.
#11
number two was made for a mandatory assignment in english where we were supposed to emulate a whitman poem, using poetic devices as they were used in the poem we were emulating (ie, synechdoche where whitman uses synechdoche, parallel construction where whitman uses parallel construction, ect.) suffice to say, I hate my piece, and I didnt have any fun writing it.

My point is that I agree with Corey...
#12
top ) bad. plain. boring.
middle ) slightly better, but hte title destroyed the piece for me, and the writing did not redeem it enough
bottom ) slightly better than middle.

but i still can't vote because i dont like any of them much particularly.
#13
the last one was dumb
seven acts?
what kinda play do you go to with seven acts?

at least be shakespearean and give it 5, show some sense

oh...and two for me, none for number three.
#15
wow. they were really bad. number two was best though.
when im with you, there's nothing I wouldn't do, i just wanna be you're only one. im gasping out of straws, taken aback by what i saw that night before when we were all alone...
#17
Quote by Phoebus
the last one was dumb
seven acts?
what kinda play do you go to with seven acts?

at least be shakespearean and give it 5, show some sense


Ummmm it was six acts.
Quote by Cal UK
Alk hit the nail on the head there.