#1
I wrote this for a girl that I like...i know..aww right? lol
its just first verse right now, im thinking of putting a solo right after first verse (been listening to pink floyd a lot lately ).

i just wanted to know if its good so far, and what i should change etc.
thanks.

crit 4 crit

http://umair.dmusic.com/music/stream/hifi/348435/.880fda5b/stream.m3u

if consequences dictate my course of action

i should play god and shoot you myself
Last edited by giventofly at Mar 7, 2007,
#4
This is good, but the guitar and voice sound a little out of tune sometimes. I liked it, though. The vocals are a little loud in comparison to the guitar. I think you should make sure the vocals flow a little better and make sure the guitar is in tune. I think a melodic pink-floydish solo would go great with this. I think it would flow nicely into a hard rocking part too, but it's for a girl so I don't think you would really want that. If the girl doesn't know much about music I'm sure she will think it's the most amazing thing ever. I wrote a song for a girl once, but she broke up with me before I showed it to her so I used different lyrics - Bad story. Your voice kind of reminded me of Panic! at the Disco, which is one of the more mainstream bands I actually kind of like. You asked for things you should change, so all I will say is just make sure your guitar is in tune and the vocals go well with it. Besides that, good luck with the girl! Will you be playing it for her or letting her hear a recording? Good job and good luck. Mind critting mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=522091