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Naps will never be the same...

Tired from a long day of swimming and school, I planted my body on the comfortable couch. I laid my head against the arm rest and had my body stretched out in front of me. I fell into a deep sleep...

Meanwhile, Kenny, my brother, was working out at the local 24 Hour Fitness. Three hours after his routine, he came home with a stench that usually stinks up the house for a few hours. However, taking a shower was not on his mind as he walked through the door.

You see: chili, burritos, and tacos are great dinner items. However, one must know how to keep THEIR OWN BODILY GASES TO THEMSELVES...

Kenny, being the 23 year old college student he is, pulls down his pants and sees the victim across the room. He lightly walks toward me (the victim, jackass), and plants his sweaty, rotten, acidic butt cheeks on my face. Then, after a long workout and a previous night full of beans, lets out the longest, most repulsive, sickening, ghastly, sordid, and nauseating fart ever produce on this planet- right into my face

The liquid produced from this juicy fart and the sweat is called


Awaken from the disturbance, I leap up off of the couch and run towards the bathroom- crying, laughing, and vomiting all at the same time. It was then I realized what the words "brotherly love" meant.

The stench upon my face remained for the next two and a half days- even swimming in a chlorinated pool twice a day.
We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams.
Just to scare him I would have pulled my weiner out
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i woulda cut off his dick dude, thats so ****ed up. i can't believe you didn't smash his face in with a plate of glass.
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HAHA, wow.

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why would you ever admit that happened to you?
from daylight...
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Quote by divid3d
why would you ever admit that happened to you?

It happened a long time ago, only now am I sharing it. lol.

Little fun fact for UG: ass wine does not taste good.
We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams.

You should kick his ass, or get back at him some other way. That was uncalled for.
Shit, man, I'd kick your brother's face in if I were you.
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wow man westo i truly feel ur pain man....
I love music!
I hate how it turns us on each other!
I support music as a whole! not this useless hate!
Quote by Metal claw
Amazing and educational.

I just learned a new word: Sordid.

Metal Claw, you never cease to amaze! i don't know what the "buddy list" in my control panel means, but you're on the list now.

westo, i think you making this thread proves you are one sick perverted bastard. you da man!

BTW i rated this thread 5-stars.
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I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
Last edited by SomeoneYouKnew at Mar 9, 2007,
This one time I went to fuck my girlfriend, but I forgot it was April Fool's day. Well, I stuck my penis in, and it turns out she had put hot sauce in her pussy. The rest of the night was pretty bad.

0.999... = 1
aw, jesus, reading that ruined my day completely. i was looking forward to going out to lunch earlier. now i just want to curl up in the bath and scrub myself clean. ergh.

reading that's like seeing pictures of a car crash; you just can't look away no matter how nasty and disturbing it is...errrghhh. i feel for you, i really do. your brother ought to be put down.
<//////>~ dA
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For men.
Atleast it wasn't balls sweat
hahahahhahahahahahasghasyfdhahahsagdsvfhgashah. -My mouth broke for laughing at your life.
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This fine fellow speaks the truth.

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dude sonic music??? you're my hero!

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Love you

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hahahaha, So did this "ass wine" spray into your face or something?
but it aint house music that makes me want to dance.
ass wine ahahahh

Just as i was doubting these forums. Im glad i came here. very funny indeed.
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I've never been so disgusted and impressed with your writing skills in my life.
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Nice, I'm glad I don't have brothers.
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But really it's cos she got fat!

No fat chicks !
Quote by Metal claw
Amazing and educational.

I just learned a new word: Sordid.

So did I: Ass

And, owned.
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For men.

oooh my god. perfect
We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams.
Something's Changed

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