#5
wait, how can they tell? is it something to do with a lower sperm count or something?
Quote by jxljxl
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#6
if your penis had friction marks then yes
if you have spunk on youy jeans then yes
if you walk in with your hand down your trousers then yes

he probably just assumes you do
Quote by mh400nt
Theres rats running around outside my window, one of them has an apple, he looks very happy about this.

Quote by Oblivion_Rps
Oh ****

Aaaah well. It gives me an excuse to rape.


Quote by Jaymz_515
Bunnywunnywabbitywoos.
#8
Quote by big duck
if your penis had friction marks then yes


he probably just assumes you do



Those are the main 2 ways.


Obviously, method 2 is the only way unless he has to look at your wang.
Co-President of UG's Tubgirl Virgins Club

#9
Quote by rhcp_freak
wait, how can they tell? is it something to do with a lower sperm count or something?


If you don't wank the sperm just sort of dissolve into your balls, and you make new ones. Plus the only way they could count your sperm is by making you masterbate!
Quote by mh400nt
Theres rats running around outside my window, one of them has an apple, he looks very happy about this.

Quote by Oblivion_Rps
Oh ****

Aaaah well. It gives me an excuse to rape.


Quote by Jaymz_515
Bunnywunnywabbitywoos.
#10
Quote by big duck
the only way they could count your sperm is by making you masterbate!



Kerching!
Co-President of UG's Tubgirl Virgins Club

#15
well unless you have friction marks, as stated above, no, not really. But its a general assumption that most young people do, and besides, if he knows he cant tell anybody, so why do you care?
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#16
Quote by daytripper75
yeah dude, they know.

they probably will tell your parents as well.

have fun.


haha

everybody masterbates

its natural!

can i get a hand
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#17
well i doubt they do, but if you wank too much "you can go blind"
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#19
Quote by metallica_death
well i doubt they do, but if you wank too much "you can go blind"



Just so everyone can read it properly


Co-President of UG's Tubgirl Virgins Club

#20
Quote by metallica_death
well i doubt they do, but if you wank too much "you can go blind"

U jokin?
Quote by RHCP94
Green Day should be so proud that there band is better than a bunch of 16 year olds.................medals anyone?


Quote by вяaи∂ иєw
Gotta love ticked off metal heads.


JAMMER-91





Hare Krishna
#22
How can they tell if you wank?

Can they tell by just lookin at you?

Do they tell you parents?
Quote by RHCP94
Green Day should be so proud that there band is better than a bunch of 16 year olds.................medals anyone?


Quote by вяaи∂ иєw
Gotta love ticked off metal heads.


JAMMER-91





Hare Krishna
#23
Quote by JamieB
Just so everyone can read it properly



Thanks, I had to squint before
Hi, I'm Peter
#24
Quote by jammer-91
How can they tell if you wank?

Can they tell by just lookin at you?

Do they tell you parents?


Yeah, they can see it in your eyes. As well, if he does find out, your parents are gonna KILL you. Dirty ****er.
#25
Quote by Guitarded01
Yeah, they can see it in your eyes. As well, if he does find out, your parents are gonna KILL you. Dirty ****er.

What do they look for in your eyes... Im never gonna fall sick again... Can you trick them?

For example, once to prove i was not dehdrated i put lotion all over my body and it worked... skipped drips!
Quote by RHCP94
Green Day should be so proud that there band is better than a bunch of 16 year olds.................medals anyone?


Quote by вяaи∂ иєw
Gotta love ticked off metal heads.


JAMMER-91





Hare Krishna
#26
Dude, try going to your doc and say "I think I may have caught an STI" Then have him fondle you asking where it hurts, then askin all these questions... Having the tests done, they all come out negative and then he says "Do you masturbate" and you know then he knows you do.
Sat in a lab, curing diseases. They actually LET me play with chemicals!
#27
Quote by jammer-91
How can they tell... Im never gonna fall sick again


Theres nothing you can do to stop what they're seeing. Its a very slight tinge of colour in your eyes that gives it away. Its because semen contains a certain vitamin that is released in massive dosages when you wank, and that vitamin gives your eyes the almost perfect white colour. SO if its slightly off, the doctors will know.
#28
Quote by Dirk Gently
Thanks, though I still had to squint



No problemo
Co-President of UG's Tubgirl Virgins Club

#29
Quote by Guitarded01
Theres nothing you can do to stop what they're seeing. Its a very slight tinge of colour in your eyes that gives it away. Its because semen contains a certain vitamin that is released in massive dosages when you wank, and that vitamin gives your eyes the almost perfect white colour. SO if its slightly off, the doctors will know.

My eyes have a slight yellowish white.... crap
Quote by RHCP94
Green Day should be so proud that there band is better than a bunch of 16 year olds.................medals anyone?


Quote by вяaи∂ иєw
Gotta love ticked off metal heads.


JAMMER-91





Hare Krishna
#30
What can doctors do if they find out... its not illegal or anything?
Quote by RHCP94
Green Day should be so proud that there band is better than a bunch of 16 year olds.................medals anyone?


Quote by вяaи∂ иєw
Gotta love ticked off metal heads.


JAMMER-91





Hare Krishna
#31
Quote by jammer-91
My eyes have a slight yellow


Well then dont go to the doctors. Holy shit dude, how much DO you do it? Yellow? jesus....

Oh, and before, yes, too much, and you will go blind. Your halfway there.
#32
Quote by jammer-91
What can doctors do if they find out... its not illegal or anything?


Yeah, it is. They'll cut off both your hands.
#34
yeah the vitamin is what makes your eyes work, and when you're running out they go a bit yellow
Quote by mh400nt
Theres rats running around outside my window, one of them has an apple, he looks very happy about this.

Quote by Oblivion_Rps
Oh ****

Aaaah well. It gives me an excuse to rape.


Quote by Jaymz_515
Bunnywunnywabbitywoos.
#35
Quote by jammer-91
What can doctors do if they find out... its not illegal or anything?


Do you live in Saudi Arabia?

I love these threads
Someones knowledge of guitar companies spelling determines what amps you can own. Really smart people can own things like Framus because they sound like they might be spelled with a "y" but they aren't.
#36
no, not unless you tell them. if they look at your penis and it has chaffing on it, they either assume you're sexual active, or you masturbate. they can only tell if they see your penis. it's not like they can read your mind or anything.
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#37
What the hell is wrong with you people? They have no better method of telling you masturbate then they do that you're a virgin - by asking you.

Chafing? You been having sex with a cheese grater there boy? Blindness? Vitamins an eye colour changing? You guys desperately need to learn some damn biology.
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