#2
It was just alright for me. it was very repetitive, and sounded way to much like the main riff of Orion (metallica). The solos were just alright they need some speed or something more technical.

It was ok but needs some all new riffs and a personal touch its soundin a bit like a metallica wanna be
#4
Quote by chrismacker
this sounded great i loved the solos, tho they sounded more iron maiden-ish to me
great song nonetheless
4.5/10 as no song is perfect
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=546330


youve said maiden about both the songs i have up here and to be honest i dont know how, it doesnt sound anythin like maiden no matter how much i like them, and to piece of mind, i dont want a technical ass song i just want one that sounds good to me theres no point making it hard just for the sake of it. also it would have vocals over it so thats going to takethe repetitiveness out of it, do you not realise most songs repeat you cant just have 10 different riffs with no reps.
#5
I think its decent but the riffs are anything but original, i like the solos there pretty nice, i dont think the drums are very good but that doesnt really matter, and why do you say it has vocals and its called a instrumental...a instrumental doesnt have vocals, maybe thats why peace of mind said it needed to be more technical because instrumentals are always really complicated and long

Its nice but it gets boring and i believe it would even with vocals, so i will give it a 7/10 because its much better than some songs on UG haha
Quote by unfathomable_bo
Well it isnt hard to bend a string that has the tension of a piece of well cooked spaghetti, especially when you have hands like goalkeeper gloves


My songs: (more to come) (C4C's)
Screams fell silent underneath the black sun
#6
Quote by ch715dallat
youve said maiden about both the songs i have up here and to be honest i dont know how, it doesnt sound anythin like maiden no matter how much i like them, and to piece of mind, i dont want a technical ass song i just want one that sounds good to me theres no point making it hard just for the sake of it. also it would have vocals over it so thats going to takethe repetitiveness out of it, do you not realise most songs repeat you cant just have 10 different riffs with no reps.


Dude dont get so defenseve. You put your song online for people to give you their opinions i gave you mine. never did i say you need to make a Necrophagist style song with 50 different technical riffs. To me your riffs were very simplistic and repetitive ( not in the style of metallica at all) I just thought if you gave the riffs some color with a little bit of technical ability it would make the song sound 100% better and show off your guitar playing ability
#7
This really could use an Orion kind of interlude part. It got kind of repeating and the solos weren't anything too special.

By the way: I'm feeling James and Kirk, but where are Lars and Cliff? I understand that you're a guitarist and this is a work in progress, but it could of used a better rhythm section.
#8
You've been listening to Metallica's Master of Puppets too much. A lot like Orion, but hey, there's nothing wrong with the riffs. The entrance is better than your other instrumental but its not perfect, but nobody is so...
The solos were more thrashy but still there's lots of room for improvement. But because you've still got the rest of your life perfecting your skills, there's no doubt that you can make something really good... Just don't rely too much on Master of Puppets,
7.5/10

Will you crit mine? (in sig)
#9
Hey man thanks for the crit on my song!

Anyways as for the song, the acoustic intro seemed a little boring. I would just say put in some chords and let them ring out, but instead I edited your song myself just to give you an idea of how I think it could be improved (see the attachment below).

As for the rest of the song, the riffs are nice, but, I hate to say it, they do get very repetitive. Now, I know it probably wouldn't seem that way if you had vocals in the song, but seeing as how you wanted this to be an instrumental, you should do more variations. One thing I also like about instrumentals, is if in the middle, there's an acoustic type interlude. That's always a nice touch. I even get bored of listening to Call of Ktulu the whole way through, just because some of the riffs are repeated so much. So just add in some variations, like more palm muted sixteenth notes, just to vary the rhythm. If you do that, alternate between the p.m.'ed notes and some notes in the minor scale. One good example is in either Like light to the flies by trivium, or Bed of Razors by COB.

As for the solos, try not to use the pentatonic boxes so much. Also vary the rhythm here too, by adding in maybe sixteenth triplet notes with some minor scale stuff or arpeggios( if you can play them ). Try starting out the solos with some trippy bends or slides or something. One thing I always try to do is start out with a melodic intro to a solo, and kind of build up gradually, then just rip an insane lick or a really high bend. A good example of this is the solo in Fade to Black.

Overall, the song has good potential, but some of the riffs and solos are just too bland. Just work on the song a little longer. On some of my songs, it takes me at least 4-5 weeks of working on just that song to get everything the way I want it. Just take your time, and make sure everything sounds great. Just improve on some of those points that I mentioned and it'll be awesome.
As of right now though, it gets a 5.5/10. Not trying to be rude man, I'm just trying to help you .
Attachments:
Metal instrumental 2 acoustic part.zip
#10
^^ You really made a cool intro there man real nice, thanks i might change the lead bit a bit but thats real nice. Anyhoo i know ive written instrumental but i didnt really mean a stand alon instrumental i just mean i have no vocals as of yet therell prob be vocals for it later. but yeah thanks for the crit, did you ever get that song exported in GP4 so i could have a listen with teh RSE.?
#13
imin a bad moodnow.....tht was a pileof crap....... repetetiv and boring.....4/10
Quote by dark&broken
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#14
In my opinion its not too bad, but i can feel the Metallica MOP influences.

Good in my opinion so id say 8/10.

oh yeah the intro does get a wee bittie boring and repetitive, but i can only listen to it in midi format....

any chance you could crit mine maybe??
thanks in advance

db

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=565095