#1
This is a new song I just wrote called Uncovering. I'm working on the audio and should have it up within the week, but I wanted to post the lyrics to see if anyone can suggest changes before I record it. This song is about a guy who hasn't seen his ex in years, and when he does they sit to talk. He then uncovers more pain than he had had at the end of the relationship. I hope you guys like it. Crit 4 Crit.

Here are the lyrics...

It's been awhile since we've spoken
But I've got nothing to say
It's been the hardest year for me
To watch us slowly slip away

Chorus:
Here we are uncovering
We never stop discovering
How we feel and how to deal
With losing someone
Losing everyting we worked for
Watching our faith walk out the door
We never stop uncovering the pain

We sit down at a table
To talk about the times we shared
But all I hear are your secrets
Did you think I wouldn't care?

Chorus

...Hope you guys like it.

P.S. This is the rewritten version. It pulls from some of what the original had. The chorus is the same, but the verses are better in my opinion. If anyone wishes to see the original, feel free to ask so you can compare the two. Thanks to all.

Peace, Anthony
Last edited by Antoniowashere at Mar 26, 2007,
#2
I like the story behind it. Did it really happen ?
feelings white the best songs.

Nice tekst, I really want to hear the whole song.
greetzz
#4
Changes in bold.

It's been awhile since we've spoken
But I've got nothing to say
It's been the hardest year for me
To watch us slowly slip away

Chorus:
Here we are uncovering
We never stop discovering
How we feel and how to deal
With losing someone we love
Losing everyting we worked for
Watching our faith walk out the door
We never stop uncovering the pain

We sit down at a table
To talk about the times we shared
But all I hear are your secrets
Did you think I wouldn't care?

Chorus

pretty good man. one idea that you can use or forget about, whatever you want, is at the end of the second chorus you can just do some thing like a "ohhhh, uncovering. ohhh oh oh ohh oh oh uncovering" while arpeggiating a chord. like i said, just an idea. and thanks for the crit on mine.
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#5
I like it. I can picture a figurepicked acoustic guitar in the background playing in 3/4. Its as perfect as any song can be. I cant think of anything to complain about at all in it. If you have time, crit mine: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=554185
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